MeatBeast coins a phrase, all hell breaks loose. Story at 11:00.

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

sigh

So I’m setting with my parents, cooking dinner for them and having a couple of beers. Momma & Poppa MeatBeast ask how the new job is going (just dandy, btw) I reply the same, but state we’ve just hired a new person, whom I descriped as a “fucktard”

Now I’ve used this phrase for well over 3 years, and no one else seems to have ever heard it. In fact, a good chuckle is had by all when I say it. However, I seemed to fail to notice that Sister MeatBeast was in the room. She thinks this new phrase is the greatest thing ever.

Here lies the problem. Sister is 14, MeatBeast is 26. In the last2 weeks, this phrase has apparently become the best thing since sliced bread in her Jr. High.

Now MeatBeast is being chased by angry paternal peasants with pitchforks and torches every night. This is not good for the new job. My boss does not like being accused of giving sanctuary to a heretic. There are also no good windmills to take cover in.

I do not care if sister MeatBeast swears. When I was her age, it was my hobby. However, the persecution is making me think of sailing away on an iceberg.

Just thought I’d share.

Oh, and if “fucktard” has pre-dated MeatBeast use, please let me know. I’m thinking of submiting it to OED.

Your lil’ fucktard,
The MeatBeast

2

Been seein that one on another forum for at least the last four years, right along side fucknugget.

3

Sad to say, even in this so-called enlightened age, filthy beasts of meat and hair are often unfairly targeted by over-protective parents. “Friend?” you’ll say, but they don’t listen. Fucktards.

4

Sorry man, but your username is gross.

puke

5

Tell them to look on the bright side. At least it’s better than my own personal favorite…

“fuckstain.”

Gross AND descriptive.

6

Yeah, sorry, but I’ve been seeing “fucktard” for many, many years. It is quite the wonderful word, when used sparingly.

My two favs:

Fucknozzle (not original)
Fucksquiggle (original)

7

Well, you are a filthy beast OMAH after all. Surely this can come as no surprise to them.

8

What were you and your parents setting?

[Far Side] I said “we’re sitting ducks,” not “setting ducks.” I’m not stupid. [/Far Side]

9

I’ve seen the word fucktard used here many times, before your arrival. I don’t think you coined it.

Try the Pit if you want to see some really horribly creative ones. Not the recent stuff though, go back a few years.

10

At the next family gathering try this one;

Fuckwhistle

It kills.

Variations of assmonkey, assgrip, assclamp, etc. Sometimes even buttplug gets a laugh, when used out of context that is.

11

Refer to the villagers with the pitchforks as knobs. It’s hardly new, but it is a classic.

12

Does your sister know AssClowns? I like AssClowns. Well, as a swear word. I dont’ like actual AssClowns.

Just teach your sister all the swear words you possibly can. Let her watch Full Metal Jacket.

13

I have been using the word fucktard for many years.
I used to say “fucking retard”* but that got to be to much to say, so fucktard came to be a part of my world.

I do not use this as a slam to those who are mentally incapable

14

This Usenet posting from June of '94 is the earliest occurrence I could find in Google Groups, so the word has been in use for at least 10 years.

15

Well, you may be a persecuted MeatBeast in your neck of the woods, but you sure tell a good tale.

I love you, MeatBeast!