I aam often upset with my boyfriend, whom chooses to play computer instead of play with me quite often. When we talk he asks what he can do to change, and I let him know. I am always told that men try their hardest to keep their women happy, but why is it that they never do? Do they not know how?
Questioner of all things human, Lystra.
I assume since he’s still your boyfriend he must make you happy sometimes.
A GD?
An MPSIMS?
A GQ?
A BBQ?
GD,
Men who try too hard to please their women can come of as “wimpish”
MPSIMS,
My boyfriend prefers starcraft to sex.
GQ,
Why Does my boyfreind prefer the computer to me?
BBQ,
Why does a poster who lives in Canada have so little grasp of the English language?
OOps,
A quick peek at the posters homepage reveals,
http://www.geocities.com/andrealeier/
She is 15, cut her some slack.
Her intrests are:
Verbatim quotes all,
My Interests,
I like my computer. Ranting and raving. Talking about what I know that I know. Understand. I do
About me,
I am 15, partially insane, psychotic, pretty, and athiest. Now you can judge anything that I mention as “pre pubescent”. If you really understand, let me know. If you don’t, ask.
Family,
My family is strange and dysfunctional. You don’t understand
Friends,
I have no friends.
Don’t forget to click on the LSD homepage link while you are there.
How old is your boyfriend?
If he’s 22, then he shouldn’t be devoting more time to video games than to you. But if he’s 22, you have more problems than video games to worry about. If he’s closer to your age, then I think that some amount of video game fixation is normal.
If you’ve told him that the way he spends his time playing video games makes you unhappy, and it doesn’t affect how he spends his time, then welcome to being a teenager and dating a teenager.
You’re right about one thing. The objects may change, but you may face this exact same issue in later years. Sometimes men are boys, no matter how old they are.
Today for you, tomorrow for me.
Teenage boys are like that. Some women I asked said the boys get better after 23, but not always.
Lystra, this is exactly the sort of question you should be asking at your age. And if you will learn the lesson I am about to impart to you now, you will have a much happier life.
If your boyfriend is repeatedly doing something that makes you unhappy, that he knows makes you unhappy, and won’t stop, then it is time to get a new boyfriend.
Listen to me carefully - You cannot change him -
While there may not be too many in the 15 year old dating pool, eventually you will find that there are many men out there who genuinely want to make the woman they are with happy. Hold out for one of those, and accept nothing less.
Lucretia is right - you probably won’t take her advice though, few people do. Like me, they keep trying and trying to change the person, but all the person is is a nacissistic, self-absorbed slug.
The Prince: “Did you kill Jahamaraj Jah?”
Lady: “Yes.”
The Prince: “My Gods! Why?”
Lady: “His existence offended me.”
On the other hand, don’t expect your boyfriend (or anyone else) to give you happiness. Decide what makes you happy and seek it out, decide what makes you unhappy and avoid it, but don’t depend on other people for your emotions. It’s your life; don’t hand over control of it to anyone else.
on the other other hand, maybe starcraft (or whatever game it is) makes him happy. Why are you trying to deprive him of his happiness?
One of my hobbies is working on cars (when I have one that I like). I used to date this girl who was jealous of my mustang (a '69 all dressed up. Sweet car) and we had a big fight every time I tried to do anything to it, even though the rest of my week was devoted to trying to make her happy. Needless to say, we lasted about a month. Relationships are about compromise. The guy is not obligated to shower the girl with happiness 24/7, and vice-versa. If something makes him happy, don’t try to take it away. Let him have it. If something makes you happy, he should appreciate that as well.
Sounds like you have a pretty one-way vision of what’s supposed to happen.
Joe Cool
I understand that I can’t change a person, but thougght perhaps he would change himself. And about him playing computer because it makes him happy, he has already told me that he plays to pass time, and to hide when he is upset because he won’t cry. I don’t know, it just feels like he doesn’t understand anything I say to him. Anyways, I suppose I’ll stop whining now! Thanks you all for your addvice.
Questioner of all things human, Lystra.
This is a subject better suited to the good folks in MPSIMS. I’ll move the thead over there.
NYC IRL III
is on April 15th. Do you have what it takes?