I have heard men say that sex is like pizza-- even when it’s bad, it’s pretty good. However, most women I know would not agree, including me. I’d rather have no sex than bad sex, mostly because bad sex either hurts or leaves me totally cold. My feeling is, if I have to get that sticky and not get off, I’d rather just eat some candy by myself and go to bed.
My friend recently broke up with a girl who he claimed was bad in bed, and who also wasn’t very pretty or nice. She also cheated on him. Yet, when he had a chance to bag her again, he took it, because, as he said, “it was better than nothing.” I find this logical rather mind boggling, and it made me wonder.
So guys, ever had bad sex? What made it bad? And would you rather have bad sex than no sex? How bad would a girl have be for your to turn it down the next time she offered?
I understand these words you’re using, but not in the order that you use them. What is this “bad sex” of which you speak?
Ignoring that oxymoron and trying to answer the last question, I suppose I’d turn down diseased sex, or painfully violent sex without, um… “release”, and sex with a guy (I’m weird like that).
I hate to generalize but some of the more attractive women I’ve been with were horrible at sex.
A lot of them would just lay there like a dead corpse. No kissing or caressing me back. This really annoys the shit out of me because I can’t help thinking that this girl is so full of herself she thinks all she has to do is lay there like a rag doll and I’ll love her to death for it. :rolleyes: (I admit I’m speculating here)
That said I still don’t walk away “cold” from the experience but rather I just wouldn’t have much impetus to “go for it” again.
Also on a few occasions, there has been an… oder. I’ve been told that oder comes from a yeast infection. I don’t know. What ever it is, I wish ladies would keep it locked up until that condition clears or goes away.
Of course this is how they’re going to do it if nobody shows them the way you prefer it to be done. Did you give all the dead corpses advice, tips and such? Or did you just finish up, leave, and then decide to lambast them on the internet? I could understand if you said you’d prefer this and that to a reasonable expectation, and they couldn’t fulfill it for you. But to say nothing and continue, and then behind their backs say that they were the worst… well, I just don’t get that. I mean, if your SO isn’t doing what you expect, someone’s gotta tell 'em how its done, right?
Sorry if I got that wrong about you, I only it mention because you said ‘…I just wouldn’t have much impetus to “go for it” again’. Which only tells me that you’d rather not waste time teaching, but to move on and hope for one that does know what they’re doing. You could be missing out. I’m curious to know if anyone with these kinds of bad experiences atleast made suggestions for improvement before labeling their prey a “corpse”.
It’s hard for me to believe that there are people out there who are so naive when it comes to sex that they don’ t know they should do more than just lay there. Really, I mean unless you’ve been living in a cave on Mars all your life you should know at least a little reciprocation is appreciated.
As far as me teaching them goes?
I was a lot younger when all this was going on. I’ll admit I was too immature to grasp the whole concept of me teaching them bit.
Also it should be noted that these were, uh… casual encounters and NOT women who I considered to be my SO.
I’ve run into a few situations where I’ve found a woman seriously unattractive, but interested in me - in each case I’ve avoided the act. Actually got out of there fast.
I can only think of one case where I considered it seriously ‘bad sex’, but I can’t remember the details.
I reckon that males are programmed to spread it about, and females are programmed to be devious.
So, on astro’s list – which are dealbreakers? Which would make the sex so bad that you’d rather not have sex than have sex with someone who did (or didn’t do) X?
and 2) definite deal-breakers, 1) more than 2) in that cluelessness can be overcome with diligent instruction, but a bad attitude is indicative of a bad character, as in “I gave it up, you want MORE? What more is there? Here it is, and now you owe me bigtime for providing you with access to these sacred parts.” It’s not the parts I care about as much as the knowledge that you like the very idea of having sex with me.
Usually not worth the energy to give instructions to overcome 2), though sometimes that can be fun with a willing learner. With a resentful “I know what I’m doing, you jackass” type of learner, not so much.
3,4,5, and 6 are bad, but it might take some time to discover that they’re not just one-time aberrations. If they hold up, especially after inquiry, get out. Fast. You can always finishing zipping up in the hallway.
Probably number 5. With any of the other five choices, you could wave away the devil on your shoulder by thinking Just hurry up and finish and you can get out of here. But if there’s a hygiene problem, there’s no amount of rationalizing that’s gonna get you through that one.
See, I had #5 down as “maybe you could get used to it” in certain cases.
I’m probably among the more germophobic population here, and I’ve definitely broken up with women when the hygiene issue reared its ugly head (or when I gave some ugly head, olfactorily speaking) but I usually tried out at least the concept of “Can I get okay with this?” The answer was usually “No way,” but I compelled myself to think “Maybe this isn’t so bad? Maybe it’s a one-time thing that a shower would eliminate, or at least render tolerable? Am I just just being finicky? Maybe ‘different’ is good?” As I say, the answers were usually “No, no, no, no, and GMTF out of here” but it wasn’t necessarily a deal-breaker.
I really enjoy sex - every part of it. From the foreplay to the act itself to the cuddling afterward. The feel of skin on skin is so enjoyable.
And so, for me, bad sex is with someone who is not enjoying it. My last girlfriend didn’t really seem to be having fun. It seemed like she did it because she felt she had to - it was an obligation. That made it not-fun for me either.
I agree with all of the above, but I’d like to add one more to the list.
It’s embarassing to admit this, but hey, we’re all friend’s, right?
If you don’t know what “retarded ejaculation” is, look it up on Google. Then ask yourself if infinite pushups are your idea of a good time. Add onto this being pestered about “don’t you think I’m pretty?” And then having to justify your reaction with the old “It’s not you, it’s me.”
If that’s not enough, imagine the girl only “working on you” for about 20 seconds, then going into a crying/suicide fit for an hour because she thinks she is not pretty enough (and to top it off – she ain’t!).
Better than nothing? Personally, I’d rather be watching reruns of Saved by the Bell.
Now, I realize that life is not a porn movie, and real women in real life don’t enjoy “facials.” I suppose I understand, though I’m under no obligatioj to enjoy that fact.
A common misconception among women is that men enjoy facials because it is demeaning to women. That’s a stupid misconception, and (for the most part, anyway) just plain wrong. Let me try to explain why a good many men enjoy giving them.
Irrational as it may seem, a great many men tie their sense of self-worth to their sexual prowess. And jism is an extension of that prowess. We own it. It is part of our sexual worth. If you can produce a gallon instead of a thimblefull, it makes you a studly man. A woman who takes it into her body is showing you that she is willing to accept a vital part of your core being into her. A woman that takes it on her tits or stomach or ass? She thinks of you as a stud. A woman that takes it on the face? This is proof positive, a documented and notarized cite that you are, as you always suspected, a God of Sex. Men like to believe that.
Now imagine, if you will, an mythical woman who just thinks the stuff is gross. “Ew, get it off of me! Get me a towel! Get me a shower! Get me a toothbrush and some bleach!” This is a rejection of our sexuality, the very fiber of our being. Might as well say “I find your very soul repulsive.” That is not sexy. That is not fun.
Not rational, you say? Who ever promised you that human sexuality was rational?
So ladies, do your man a favor – Take one in the eye every now and then. Smile. Pretend to enjoy it. Lustily moan “More!” (But don’t demand it – hey, that well has gone dry.)
We’d appreciate it. We’ll reward your enthusiasm with flowers, a promise to leave our wives, and a visit to your parents. I promise!
I think when most guys say there is no such thing as bad sex it is because the end result is the same. It is similar to going to McDonalds or an expensive 5-star restaurant. While eating, there is definitely a difference, but when you are full, you have the same end result.
Some women (and men for women) are not as exciting or sexual as others, and sometimes it is just because of a lack of chemistry between the couple, sometimes it is the guys fault, and sometimes the woman just plain out sucks in bed.
I have been with women that I only enjoyed five seconds of the sex (the last five seconds that is), and have actually walked away feeling that I just wasted an hour or so of my life.
But the good sex definitely outweighs the bad by a landslide.
