Misread thread titles

Are there stores that sell extremely expensive vet items to customers?

Help me understand “Cunnilingus” and “Loab”

Avenging Ratios

Hello, I am 1 : 4. You killed my father., 1 : 2. Prepare to die.

Lions try a walkout

C’mon guys, I know the Thanksgiving game against the Bills was a heartbreaker, but you have a good chance against the Jags this Sunday!

On repeated first glances my brain initially interprets this one as being directed a persons who were employed as dishwashers (hey, I’ve been one!).

Dishwashers- What do you think of Bosch?

Ehhhh, they’re no Hobart.

Gotta cleanse away all those nasty sins dontcha know.

Cat Colors: Then and Now

They evolve fast, those felines.

Dating A Bible

Another one that I didn’t actually misread, but I totally pictured the poster taking a bible out for a nice dinner.

…and then sneaking out with the Quran for dessert?

I guess cheating is OK as long as you own up to it, but I will say that all my misreadings were genuine, even if they only lasted a second or less. And yes, “Cat Colors: Then and Now” was one of them. Probably because we have so many posts about cats. And perhaps also because I have developing cataracts in one eye.

I came in to post almost exactly this. Except I pictured a Chuck Tingle style novel.

Explain the whole bullet train thing to me.

It’s a train that goes fast. What else is there to explain?

Weird question about carbon dating

When two carbon atoms love each other very much . . .

Is the “Respect for Managers Act” an overall win for liberals?

Karens everywhere would like to speak to the liberals’ manager…

So would I! None of their checks have arrived yet!

Every time I read the title “Why did Matthew Perry’s colon explode”, I think it’s about the 19th century Commodore Matthew Perry and wonder if his colon exploded because it was hit by a cannonball.

In that thread, I postulated that Commodore Perry’s exploding colon was what initially kept him out of Japan.

Concerts where the frontperson is wasted. How did you feel, and what did you do?

I didn’t misread this, but I interpreted it as “concerts where the frontperson’s talents were not properly utilized to the best of their abilities” until I clicked on it. I felt dumb :blush:

Your interpretation is accurate, too. Dando’s talents, in fact, were not properly utilized to the best of [his] abilities.

Can someone give me a “mediation-for-dummies” explanation of what mediation is? (I am trying it)

“Hurry, my client gets here in five minutes!”