Monty Python non sequitur thread (Part 1)

Is this the right room for an argument?

Oh, I’m sorry. This is abuse!

Yes, it’s Attila the Nun: A simple country girl who took a vow of eternal brutality.

Look, I’m not saying that being a leper was a bowl of cherries. But it was a living.

Is your uh, is your wife interested in…photography, ay?

I meet a lot of people and I’m convinced the vast majority of wrong-thinking people are right.

And now for something completely different.

It’s…

Aww, sorry, squire, I scratched the record…I scratched the record…I scratched the record…I scratched the record…I scratched the record…I scratched the record…

*Bravely bold Sir Robin rode forth from Camelot.
He was not afraid to die, O brave Sir Robin!
He was not at all afraid to be killed in nasty ways,
Brave, brave, brave, brave Sir Robin!

He was not in the least bit scared to be mashed into a pulp,
Or to have his eyes gouged out, and his elbows broken;
To have his kneecaps split, and his body burned away;
And his limbs all hacked and mangled, brave Sir Robin!

His head smashed in and his heart cut out
And his liver removed and his bowels unplugged
And his nostrils raped and his bottom burned off
And his peni-- *

I like a nice dance, you’re forced to!

Ni!

Well she’s broken our hearts, the little bastard. She’s been nothing but trouble and if she comes round here again I’ll kick her teeth in.

We’ve been mentioned on telly!

wink wink, nudge nudge

More witches!

There’s a dead bishop on the landing, Dad!

She your wife?

And what is the name of your ravishing wife? Wait. Don’t tell me - it’s something to do with moonlight - it goes with her eyes…

You needn’t eat the leg, Thompson. Look at that arm…