Monty Python non sequitur thread (Part 1)

Oh, don’t grovel! If there’s one thing I can’t stand, it’s people groveling.

As he’s going to be teaching politics, I’ve told him he’s welcome to teach any of the great socialist thinkers, provided he makes it clear that they were wrong.

Well he’s out distributing pamphlets to the masses but he’ll be in at six.

There is no Rule Six!

That’s a strange expression, Bruce.

Good evening. Tonight: “dinosaurs”. I have here, sitting in the studio next to me, an elk. Ahhhh!!! Oh, I’m sorry! Anne Elk - Mrs. Anne Elk.

Oh sorry! Right, here we go. You are hereby charged. One, that you did, on or about 1126, conspire to publicize a London Borough in the course of a BBC saga; two, that you were wilfully and persistently a foreigner; three, that you conspired to do things not normally considered illegal; four, that you were caught in possession of an offensive weapon, viz, the big brown table down at the police station.

Exploding is a perfectly normal medical phenomenon.

And that’s the most expensive machine in the whole hospital!

Gimme the 'oop!

Hello? Is that the North Malden Icelandic Society?

There’s another dead bishop on the landing.

Ah! He must be made of stronger stuff. Get…THE COMFY CHAIR!

Are you insinuating something?

All right, I’ll have the dead unjugged rabbit fish.

It’s…

A witch!! A witch!!

Hello, good evening and welcome to another edition of Blood, Devastation, Death War and Horror, and later on we’ll be meeting a man who does gardening.

Not necessarily. I could be arguing on my own spare time.

Flying Thompson’s Gazelle of The Yard?!?!