Well, um, can we come up and have a look?
Skip ahead a bit, Brother.
You don’t have to be a six-footer.
You don’t have to have a great brain.
You don’t have to have any clothes on.
You’re a Catholic the moment Dad came,
Because
Every sperm is sacred.
Every sperm is great.
If a sperm is wasted,
God gets quite irate.
That’s – that’s, uh, that’s enough music for now, lads. Looks like there’s dirty work afoot.
Oh, so you’re Italian, then?
I’m French! Why do think I have this outrageous accent, you silly king!
It’s funny that penguin being there innit? What’s it doing there?
I’m afraid we’re fresh out of Red Leicester.
And so the final result:
The Upperclass Twit of the Year - Gervaise Brook-Hampster.
Runner up - Vivian Smith-Smythe-Smith
Third - Nigel Incubator-Jones
Yes, yes, yes, I do follow, Mr. Anchovy, but you see the snag is… if I now call Mr. Chipperfield and say to him, “Look here, I’ve got a forty-five-year-old chartered accountant with me who wants to become a lion tamer,” his first question is not going to be “Does he have his own hat?” He’s going to ask what sort of experience you’ve had with lions.
**New Gas Cooker
With Every Other Thread! ***
*see other thread
Ordinarily, yes, sir. Today the van broke down.
i’m not dead, yet
There’s another dead bishop on the landing.
Wouldn’t hear a word against him!
It’s a bird, innit? It’s a bloody sea bird… it’s not any bloody flavour. Albatross!
But I don’t like her.
I don’t like spam!!!
Well, there’s spam egg sausage and spam, that’s not got much spam in it.
Everyone was terrified of Doug. I’ve seen grown men pull their own heads off rather than see Doug.