Plato, they say, could stick it away
Half a crate of whiskey every day
Aristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle
Hobbes was fond of his dram
And René Descartes was a drunken fart
“I drink, therefore I am”
Yes, Socrates, himself, is particularly missed
A lovely little thinker
But a bugger when he’s pissed
Listen Buster! In Reykyavik it is dark for eight months of the year, and it’s cold enough to freeze your wrists off and there’s only golly fish to eat. Administrative errors are bound to occur in enormous quantities. Look at this - it’s all a mistake. It’s a real pain in the sphincter! Icelandic HoneyWeek? My Life!
I want to have… I want to have Raquel Welch dropped on top of me.
Every sperm is sacred
Every sperm is great
If a sperm is wasted
God gets quite irate
Let the heathen spill theirs
On the dusty ground
God shall make them pay for
Each sperm that can’t be found
It’s…
Dear Sir, I wish to protest in the strongest possible terms. Yours sincerely, Brigadier N. F. Marwood-Git
Jethro Q. Walrustitty… 33,108.
Protestant, and fiercely proud of it.
Well, pretty much as I predicted, except that the Silly Party won.
Judean People’s Front… <sneer>
Splitters!
No! Never! No shrubs!
He said it again!
And now for something completely different…
This new learning amazes me, Sir Bedivere. Explain again how sheep’s bladders can be employed to prevent earthquakes.
Oh yes indeed … as the book of Maccabee said … Ye as the flea is like unto an oxen, so is the privet hedge liken unto a botanist black in thy sight, O Lord!
Blessed are the cheesemakers?!
How much do you hate the Romans?
Crucifixion?
Ooo, it makes me mad!