Right, right, stop it. This film’s got silly. Started off with a nice little idea about grannies attacking young men, but now it’s got silly.
This is a frightened city. Over these houses, over these streets hangs a pall of fear. Fear of a new kind of violence which is terrorizing the city.
Look, I stopped your sketch five minutes ago. So get out of shot. Right, director! Close up. Zoom in on me. That’s better.
And now for something completely different…
Will Louis XVI get away with the Montgolfiers’ precious plans? Is sixteen years of work to be stolen by this suspect sovereign? Is France really in the grip of a Glaswegian monarch? Watch next week’s episode of “The Golden Age of Ballooning.”
Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition
Oh bugger.
No, just a minute - I must finish, you know. Anyway, I finished up with “the actions of these vicious men is a violent stain on the community and the full penalty of the law is scarcely sufficient to deal with their ghastly crimes,” and I waggled my wig! Just ever so slightly, but it was a stunning effect.
What’s brown and sounds like a bell? Dung!
Don’t I know it, love.
Venezuelan beaver cheese?
Pie Jesu Domine [THUNK!] Dona Aes Requiem[THUNK!]
Very small rocks.
First take a bunch of flowers!
For Ralph Melish, this was not to be the start of any trail of events which would not, in no time at all, involve him in neither a tangled knot of suspicion nor any web of lies, which would, had he been not uninvolved, surely have led to no other place than the central criminal court of the Old Bailey.
Shut up! I’m in charge of this court. Stand up! Sit down! Go moo! See? Right, now, on with the pixie hats! And order in the skating vicar!
Now, alduce me to introlow myslef.
Oh my God! We’re on film!
If this is the crew who were filming us … who’s filming us now?
The plumage don’t enter into it.