Who leaps out?
Ah, you’re not going to catch me with an old one like that. Right let’s reconstruct the crime. Constable you be Inspector Tiger.
Well we interviewers are more than a match for the likes of you, ‘Two Sheds’.
I’m afraid it’s my unpleasant duty to inform you that you’re fired.
This is a particularly auspicious occasion for us this evening, as we have been told that Her Majesty the Queen will be watching part of this show tonight.
Of course, it’s a bit of a jump, isn’t it? I mean, er, chartered accountancy to lion-taming in one go. You don’t think it might be better if you worked your way towards lion-taming, say, via banking…?
And that, my liege, is how we know the earth to be banana-shaped.
It doesn’t matter why they’re dressed as a tiger. Have they got my leg?
Morning. Upstairs. Be careful, it’s very steep. Almost there.
Well we interviewers are more than a match for the likes of you, ‘Two Sheds’.
You are hereby charged that you did willfully take part in a strange sketch, that is, a skit, spoof or humorous vignette of an unconventional nature with intent to cause grievous mental confusion to the Great British Public. Evening all.
Good evening and welcome ladies and gentlemen. At this time we’d like to up the tempo a little, change the mood. We’ve got a number requested by Pip, Pauline, Nigel, Tarquin, and old Spotty - Tarquin’s mother - a little number specially written for the pubescence of ex-King Zog of Albania, and it’s entitled ‘Art Gallery’. Hope you like it.
You promised you wouldn’t do fruit this week.
Well we interviewers are more than a match for the likes of you, ‘Two Sheds’.
I know . I know you can’t. I didn’t want to say anything. I just wanted to try and ignore your crass mistake.
But now, over to the exploding version of the ‘Blue Danube’.
Three times in three days? Really?
In play:
Suppose he’s got a pointed stick.
And now for something completely different…
It’s…
Haggle properly. This isn’t worth nineteen.