Dinsdale!
Here to play Tchaikowsky’s first piano concerto in B Flat Minor is the world-famous soloist Sviatoslav Richter. During the performance he will escape from a sack, three padlocks and a pair of handcuffs.
Last week on ‘Conjuring Today’, we learned how to saw a woman in half. Today, we’ll learn how to saw her into three pieces and dispose of the body.
I’ve got ninety thousand pounds in my pajamas.
I’ve got forty thousand French francs in my fridge.
I’ve got lots of lovely lire.
Now the Deutschmark’s getting dearer,
And my dollar bills would buy the Brooklyn Bridge.
This is the end! The end! Aaargh!!
I think I’ll go for a walk.
Oh, un cadeau. Oui, oui. Allons-y. What? Let’s go.
Yes, Mr Badger, what would you like to start with?
I told them we already had one. Heeheeheehee.
- Ah, Ring Kichard, yes… but surely that’s not an anagram, that’s a spoonerism.
- If you’re going to split hairs, I’m going to piss off.
A palindrome?!?
Gloves … glasses… mustache… handkerchief… I’m going to operate!!
What’s that got to do with my bloody music?
Who’s she?
Here comes that wacky queen again!
New-Bruce, are you a Poofter?
Howls of derisive laughter, Bruce!
Bruce, crack tube! (Sound of cans opening) Any questions?
This is my only line.
I was just thinking, you know, if it was possible for me to have my choice … I’d prefer to be in the Women’s Royal Amy Corps.