Oh, a tie for this one. Brown Bunny, where we watch Vincent Gallo drive for 2 hours and where the otherwise exquisite Chloe Sevigny giving stellar fellatio couldn’t save it (As Chef Guy noted. )Then there’s Glengary Glenross. Oh, I have never wanted to throw objects at a screen more just so that something, anything, happens. Great cast , and a concept that could have been great. Booooring movie.
I haven’t seen some of the movies mentioned, but for me it was the “live action” version of Beauty and The Beast with Emma Watson. I’ve sat through a lot of bad movies but that is the only movie I’ve been to that put me to sleep, ever.
“More like English Impatient.”
I’ve not read it, but the book has more vague themes of necrophilia. That might’ve spiced the movie up.
Not really boring so much as drove me to anger about how 14 year old “deep” this movie was. Just a pointless autofellatio the entire time. See also [del]What the Bleep Do We Know!?[/del] What tнē #$*! D̄ө ωΣ (k)πow!?, a shitty, pseudoscience movie by the director of GhettoPhysics: Will the Real Pimps and Hos Please Stand Up!
My nomination is the American version of Solaris. Soderbergh is usually pretty good (except Ocean’s 12 was a mess), this wasn’t.
I was going to, but you’ve already done it. Boring, pretentious movie. I’ve never seen it through to the end.
2001: A Space Odyssey is the only movie I’ve ever stopped watching half way through (more like half an hour into it).
The only movie that’s ever put me to sleep was Gosford’s Park. My wife and I went and saw it in the theaters and I literally fell asleep, it was that boring.
A year or three back I watched it again and this time stayed awake, but I still found it incredibly dull. Which is weird, because I think Downton Abbey (created and written by the same guy) is some of the best—if not the best—TV ever made, period.
The Prehistoric segment is a bit tedious, though I didn’t find it quite so when I first saw the film back in the '70s. The bit between leaving Discovery and winding up in the hotel room was… not ‘boring’, but seemed to be designed to be watched while under the influence of hallucinogens. I enjoyed all of the space stuff.
I literally have to stop and watch Gosford Park if I ever come across it, and every time I watch it I notice something I missed first time. I find it very funny and very sad. I stopped watching Downtown Abbey after the first episode in the second season. Booooring aristocrat worship. Cardboard characters and ridiculous Victorian melodrama levels of plotting. Maggie Smith doing a cartoon version of her Gosford Park character. Blech.
The only movie that bored me enough to leave the theater was Rollerball. I know why James Caan’s career fizzled.
Stanley Kubrick’s costume drama “Barry Lyndon.” It might have been better with a more dynamic lead actor than Ryan O’Neal, but I doubt it. I saw it in a theater 40+ years ago (barely stayed awake) and occasionally have thought I should watch it again. Perhaps my opinion might change. Who knows? When friends who had seen it raved about it, I asked “What exactly did you enjoy most about it?” The universal reply: “The cinematography. It really looked nice.” Not much of a recommendation.
Well, it is a bit slow, and O’Neal was a miscast, but I found the story interesting enough to carry the extraordinary cinematography. Not Kubrick’s best, but better than most directors would have realized the story.
ETA: If I remember correctly, the whole movie was shot with natural light. And it looks wonderful.
:eek: :eek: :eek:
I’m sorry, my brain cannot process this statement so I’m just going to have to slide right over it.
My nomination: Thirteen Days. Hard to maintain tension about whether the world’s going to end in a fiery nuclear explosion when it’s thirty years on and we’re still not dead. Also features Kevin Costner mumbling inarticulately in a weird accent.
The Thin Red Line and Glengarry Glen Ross I’m ok with, but with Barry Lyndon, the quite impressive candle-lit interiors weren’t enough, at all, for me. Never saw Eyes Wide Shut for fear of boredom.
A filmmaker I had two issues with - Denis Arcand - made The Decline of the American Empire - a yamnfest about a bunch of smug, arty types sitting around a table and pontificating facile platitudes, and Jesus of Montreal, another utterly pretentious confection that bored me likewise.
Yeah Solaris and Stalker were quite glacial.
Also:
Maximum Overdrive
Cocktail (ok - seriously)
Cocksucker Blues (shitty Stones doc)
anything Warhol attempted
Maid in Manhattan (first and only date constantly elbowing me to wake up)
8 1/2 Weeks
Arthur
Kids
The Rock
Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle
You’ve Got Mail
Four Rooms
ok - I could, like, really go on, here, but I don’t exactly have all day at this, so…
The art film Last Year at Marienbad.
Michael Medved included it in one of his Worst Films of All Time books, and I have to agree. One of Medved’s comments still strikes me as hilarious – "The actors look as if they’re in a competition to see who can do the best imitation of a walking corpse. actor’s name] wins hands down, because he LOOKS like a walking corpse.
What bugs me more than it should is that, at one point, the characters play a variation of the game “Nim”, with one guy consistently beating the others. Nim is a straightforward mathematical game that you can easily calculate the winning moves for, and I was playing around with it a LOT at the time I saw the film. So I was profoundly bugged by the fact that the guy who was winning all the time was playing in a blatantly stupid fashion, and that anyone who knew anything about the game should’ve beaten his ass. Or was that the filmmaker’s point? To tell the truth, I was so bored by the rest of the film that it didn’t matter at all.
Koyaanisqatsi is an interesting film with music by Philip Glass. From wikipedia, “The film consists primarily of slow motion and time-lapse footage of cities and many natural landscapes across the United States. The visual tone poem contains neither dialogue nor a vocalized narration: its tone is set by the juxtaposition of images and music.”
I caught it in the theater as the first of a double bill. I found it fascinating, and loved it.
The second bill was, IIRC, The Blue Earth. I can’t find anything under this title, so I’m not 100% that’s what it was called anymore. The Blue Earth was Koyaanisqatsi done by people who didn’t get it. At one point there’s about a 20-minute sequence of the sun rising on a farm. In real time. With nothing but ambient noise.
Koyaanisqatsi played in the major first run theaters in Salt Lake City when I lived out there. After that, it showed up regularly at the art cinemas. People clearly liked the flick. Boring it wasn’t. But I’ve never even heard of the Blue Earth.
Blue Earth… Blue Planet… the title was something like that. Same sort of movie, but lacking energy and a good soundtrack.
ok, ouch.
That hurts.
I can’t believe that no one has mentioned “Field of Dreams” yet.
Birdman
The thin red line
What? :eek: But that was about baseb… Oh, yeah.
Just to clarify in case there’s confusion:
Koyaanisqatsi was really good, and CalMeacham and I agree on that.
The second movie I saw that evening, The Blue Planet, was garbage.
And I found it. It is indeed The Blue Planet. I don’t know how the hell it got 7.9 on IMDB. I wanted to rip it out of the projector.