I wouldn’t say I despise Untamed Heart, but it definitely didn’t have the effect on me that Mr. Rilch hoped it would when we were first going out. I’m well aware that there are communities in which a young woman can be attacked with intent to rape, but won’t report the assault because it would be “awkward” [meaning she’ll be harassed worse and no one will believe her anyway] but it’s not something I want to be reminded of during what I assume was supposed to be a love story. Furthermore, how was Christian Slater’s character not supposed to be creepy? He follows her around! He sneaks into her house on a regular basis! Okay, he saved her from being raped and left to die of exposure, and he gave her a Christmas tree. But does that really redeem his stalking? And then he dies anyway. I don’t know what I was supposed to get from that, really.
If a movie is awful, and nobody sees it, does it still suck?
Well, the same could be said of Xanadu, From Justin to Kelly, Kazaam, Gigli, Spice World, Crossroads (the Britney Spears movie, not the Ralph Macchio/Joe Seneca classic) and countless others.
I liked What the Bleep Do We Know, and I thought the dark-haired photographer chick was hot…
…but. I’d like to do, not a MST3K-style roasting, but a Bad Astronomer-style dissection of the science and philosophy involved. Talk about the difference between religion and science, and what science really is. Show what is known, what is hypothesis, and what is religion wrapped in science’s clothing. That movie could be the trigger for a good high-school course on Science, Religion, and Philosophy.
Now, the worst movie I’ve ever seen was Pink Flamingos. Only movie I’ve walked out of, only movie I’ve felt physically nauseous during.
Two of the movies that I despise have something in common: Vincent D’Onofrio. While I liked him in Men in Black, I cannot stomach either Full Metal Jacket or The Cell. Both movies damn near brought on panic attacks from the way they twisted themselves into my brain. Luckily, I only saw what I did of FMJ on cable, so I was able to convince my boyfriend to change the channel. I actually paid to see The Cell…so I wouldn’t let myself walk out.
Movies others seem to enjoy but I simply just don’t like include Moulin Rouge (previously mentioned - don’t tell my boyfriend, it’s one of his favorites) & 2001.
We did turn Van Helsing off after renting it from pay On Demand…we tried, we really did, we gave it about 30 minutes, but finally gave up.
Oh, and the recent abomination Are We There Yet? - I like Ice Cube, but the only good thing about that movie was getting to watch the Escalade be destroyed.
I did recently discover that Legend isn’t nearly as entertaining now as it was when I was in high school & hadn’t seen a lot of fantasy movies. The makeup is still outstanding, though.
It still sucks, but nobody knows it does. It comes into the world like a stillborn Satan incarnate: looking horrible, but never having inflicted the evil it was once destined to.
*House of Sand and F@#ing Fog. Kingsley’s performance is absolutely wasted, and apparently the Oscar for best score is completely meaningless.
There’s no accounting for tase (I liked** Dreamcatcher**)but how **The Big Lebowski ** and The Hudsucker Proxy show up on this list before **The Ladykillers ** is beyond me.
was this forum really started in 1999, unbeliveable. must be the topic.
while The Doom Generation is hard to beat maybe someone else had a girlfriend drag them to A Walk In The Clouds (sit keanu,sit,now speak, speak boy, “but, but, i love you”) and was unable to escape. ya feel my pain.
couldn’t help but notice the Alien 3 comments, compared to Alien resurrection Alien 3 is golden.
I can remember being actually angry because of a movie (as opposed to being disappointed and maybe regretful that I’d spent time and money badly) three times:
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**The Draughtsman’s Contract ** (directed by Peter Greenaway). The failure may have been mine, but I thought this was pretentious gibberish – insultingly so.
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Henry and June (directed by Philip Kaufman). After seeing this (well, part of it) I had to concentrate to remember why sex is a good thing.
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**Falling Down ** (directed by Joel Schumacher). Morally and intellectually repulsive, and noisily so.
6 pages and nobody’s mentioned Escape from L.A. yet?
I wish you could have warned me off of this one earlier. I got it for the kids this weekend (from the library) and after maybe fifteen, twenty minutes the younger one said tentatively, “We don’t have to watch this if y’all don’t want to…”
And by the way, why in the name of all that is holy, do people think it’s a good idea to put songs into kids’ movies? Especially if they are more than a minute long and do nothing to move the plot? When we started the movie, one of the kids said he had heard there was a really long boring song in it. By the time we gave up watching, we had already asked him, “is this it?” about four times.
Speaking of kids’ movies, I’d like to add Chitty Chitty Bang Bang to the list. After I saw this, I remembered that a friend had told me years before that I’d probably like it, and I was retroactively angry at him.
This thread has been an interesting mix of about 50% movies I never saw, 25% I wasn’t able to finish, and 25% my favorite movies of all time.
Because producers assume all children are magical little imps who will dance and sing like fairies, and who will be happy all the time when they hear the songs. Producers don’t have kids, so they think that kids always like jingly noises. Producers are evil.
Well, that’s quite intriguing. How about some details?
:dubious:
I’ve never seen an Adam Sandler movie, but judging by the level of hatred I always feel whenever I see him and his big-stupid-galoot act, I suspect that any of his movies would probably feature high on my list were I ever to go insane and actually attempt to sit through them.
Glad to see somebody finally mentioned Showgirls. Horrible, horrible movie! My spouse agreed, saying, “Any movie that has attractive naked women in it and I still can’t stand must be really bad.”
Beyond the Mat, the wrestling documentary. That was the most depressing thing I’ve seen in years. I had to walk out and wait for the spouse in the lobby about the point where Mick Foley (Mankind) was getting the crap kicked out of him (bloodily) in front of his horrified toddler daughter (and I’m neither a parent nor terribly sympathetic to kiddie angst, but this got me bad for some reason. So did the just generally depressing tones of the wrestlers’ lives).
The one I’m amazed nobody’s mentioned yet (leading me to believe I’ll probably get many aggrieved replies by fans) is Napoleon Dynamite. God, what a boring movie! We rented it a couple of months ago and kept waiting desperately for a plot to show up in the midst of this collection of random dull events in the lives of dull people. Okay, I admit it did have some fun lines (we still ask each other, “Do the chickens have large talons?” or announce that “I caught you a delicious bass”), but that doesn’t make up for 90+ minutes of excruciating boredom.
Spun was described to me as the Requiem for a Dream of meth, but it was more of an insomnia cure.
Gummo is not a story about small-town America. It’s a story about the Americans with Disabilities Act, because not all disabilities are physical.
Elephant was a fifteen minute student film, told from multiple viewpoints to make it movie-length. I didn’t like that technique in Clue and that was the best example of the type.
Exorcist: The Beginning Worst. Prequel. EVAH! And this was the complete rewrite? I’d hate to see the first version.
Deliverance was supposed to offer an argument that “civilization” is a relative term but it’s really just a source of humor. I suspect they knew as much when they wrote the dialog for “that scene”.
Wow. no one’s mentioned Animal House ? What a surprise.
Actually probably any movie in the category of being gross for the sake of being gross might get my vote. However, I’ve only had the [mis]fortune of actually watching 'Animal House."
Okay, so my theatrical guilty pleasure is that I actually like Adam Sandler films. Don’t get me wrong, they don’t rank terribly high on my favorite movie lists, but I can watch certain Sandler films over and over. In particular, Happy Gilmour. If you approach the film knowing that it’s going to be stupid, then it’s a barrel of laughs.
Suspend your good taste and you’ll be entertained, so to speak.
The fight scene between Happy and Bob Barker is unforgettable.
“The Price is Wrong, Bitch!” 
The Forgotten
What I remember most about this movie is getting angrier and angrier that this was just going to turn out to be a stupid alien cop-out. I despise this type of lazy writing. If you guess that I also hated Dreamcatcher and Signs, you’d be correct.
That was dumb for me to say that. I got on a little rant. I think I meant songwriters (not producers) have absolutely no idea what kids enjoy. No one likes jingly movie-pop music after the age of four.