I really like this advice. I like to “model” the behaviour that I think is important to my kids. I said I don’t really care for Mother’s Day, but that’s because I think it’s more important that we show our love every day, and not just on special occasions.
My teen is hairy, smelly, moody, and greasy. Often lazy and selfish, he needs a lot of reminding (often nagging) to get things done. He does have some bit of intellectual disability, but is also pretty darned functional, so that’s all OK.
I almost lost that kid when he was born- it was a bad case of “everything that could possibly go wrong did go wrong.”
I was admitted to the hospital at 18 weeks with ‘hourglassed’ membranes and on complete bedrest, deep trendelenberg, with no bathroom priveledges for weeks. I had a premature rupture of membranes at 23.2, but kept him “in” a few days. I delivered at 23.5 weeks after a cord prolapse and a traumatic “splash and slash” C/S. I really thought I had failed him.
He was the ugliest baby you ever saw- almost see-through skin, tiny and thin, covered in medical equipment. I just cried and cried because I was afraid he was going to die. Then I cried because I was afraid he was going to live. He weighed a little over a pound and his eyes were fused closed. I thought “There is no way this is gonna turn out OK.”
He had his ribs broken (twice) during CPR. He spent months in the hospital. He had multiple blood transfusions, abdominal and heart surgery. He spent a year on respiratory isolation. He had a doctor for every malfunctioning organ system. He threw up everything he ate for a solid year. I pump and pumped and pumped until I had about 16 gallons of breast milk backed up. He was a miserable little “chest monkey” that had to sleep on someone’s chest for a solid year. He took 9 meds around the clock, was on oxygen and had an apnea monitor. That kid cost about $740,000.
The day I had him was both one of the best and one of the worst days of my life! And still I love his hairy, smell, greasy self to the point of almost ridiculousness.
I’m gonna go smooch him up right now.