Anyone who on their own admission can get laid any time they ask nicely is not going to find me brimming over with sympathy here. But I expect I’m in a minority of one here. :dubious:
Ehh, I don’t think that’s fair. Do you really want it from your partner if you feel like s/he is doing you a favor? Or worse, it’s a chore for them?
It’s like Al Bundy in real life.
OP; offer some frozen yogurt, if you catch my drift. . .
And you don’t think I’ve ever had "Do we have to? :rolleyes: " …?
Or, you know, the feeling that it would be a waste of time to even bother asking?
I’d take “Sure, honey!” over that in a frozen heartbeat, because, you know, back in the day, I used to be quite the hand at getting the boat rocking once I’d had the OK to put it in the water. But that was then, and that’s another story.
Well I for one can see how the heat of the moment could be greatly diminished by having to call out “Oh, oh, huitzilopochtli!!”
HA!
OP, how old are you two? Is the BF on any meds that could be hampering his sex drive? Lost his job recently? Had any major life changes that might be stressing him out?
Gesundheit.
Is he tapping his resources with too much porn?
I didn’t like having sex with my ex for the last few years we were still married. I viewed it as a chore because I really wasn’t into her (no pun intended). If you’re attracted to someone then 4 months without sex is an eternity. If you’re not attracted, it sure doesn’t seem as long and you always come up with excuses as to why tonight isn’t good.
I’m not holding out hope for your relationship huitzilopochtli. As you said, he doesn’t dig you. I think you should move on.
Does he only drink rainwater and pure grain alcohol? Does he talk about his essence?
I’ll be right over.
As I was reading this response, here’s the song that came up on Ipod shuffle. :eek:
But if it weren’t for grudging sex, he’d have no sex at all.
You’ve only been together for 3 years and already having major sex issues? Not good. Many possibilities here:
A) He’s cheating. But you said you doubt it
B) He’s not into you anymore. Which covers, possibly that he realizes he’s gay, has a low sex drive due to medication, depression or just not as high a libido as you, (he tried to keep up with you in the sack the last 3 years and finally came to the realization he just can’t fuck as much as you),maybe another woman he knows through work or school and is falling in love with but nothing has happened yet and he feels guilty.
or C) I have no idea. You can’t change him and if you can’t live without sex or have to be the one to “ask nicely” all the time and never ever having your lover just take charge and ravage you like a savage in bed, then dump the mutherfucker already.
I asked nicely last night. It was pretty good
I guess I can live with that. I’m 39. He’s 46. He doesn’t take any meds. He is healthy. He smokes a lot
I did have one too many glasses of wine last night. And to be clear, it doesn’t always happen when I ask. But it does it general if I only ask every few months.
I consider myself to have a low sex drive, but four months? No way. I’d be completely happy with twice a month. I’m almost 52.
Maybe I should eat more raw oysters or something.
Low testosterone can effect desire (as can other medical things).
This is such an easy thing to be tested for - and easy to fix. It might not be the case, but I’d bet there’s at least a 25% chance it is.
I think I’m gonna need the OP’s phone number to really be able to assist