I’ve come to realize that I’m perpetually gonna be the bad guy where my ex is concerned. After all, I’m the one that “removed” himself emotionally from the marriage. I’m the one that was “unsupportive” when all she wanted was a YES man. I’m the one that “forced” her to escape her unhappy relationship. I’m the one that moved out, 6 months after she stopped sharing our bed and hopped into someone else’s. I’m the one “forcing” her to move in with Dick because I’m threatening to cut off the hereto unrestircted money/credit supply.
She has steadfastly refused to make any decisions or even admit that she has fucked up and lied through her teeth for over a year. Yet, I’m going to be the bad guy in her eyes no matter what I do. In her eyes, she’s been flexible and patient and entirely selfless for years on end. A real martyr - just like her mother. But I’m the selfish bastard, always thinking about myself and not considering her needs and feelings.
I’m so sick of this fucked up logic that she’s fully rationalized over the past couple of years. I’m sick and tired of her holier than thou attitude and how she truly believes that she’s done absolutely everything she could to keep our marriage together and I’ve done absolutely nothing. If that’s the case, how come she continues to force me to make decisions she ought to be making herself. If she’s so fucking unhappy, how come she’s never filed divorce papers and refuses to do so even now? Because she know that like every other major decision in our marriage, this too will be made by me. She abdicates responsibility for every decision and then sits back and waits for me to make it for her. Oh, she can decide how to organize the household and the kids’ schedule. It’s the other, often unpleasant stuff like finances, job, insurance stuff that she can’t decide on. Even now, she calls me and asks me how she should set up her new contract for the new job she’s started. Should she do it as an employee with a W-9 tax form (needs a soc. sec. number for that) or as a corp to corp using MY company name? What is a W-9 anyway?
Look fuck-wit!.. WHY THE FUCK WOULD I CARE WHAT YOU DO WITH YOUR JOB CONTRACT!!! WHY DON’T YOU ASK YOUR DICKHEAD BOYFRIEND!!! He’s a lawyer, I’m sure he can figure these things out. And while we’re at it… have him pick out the nicest winter coat for you! Why ask me? Why do you think I need to be involved in this decision? You certainly didn’t ask me about the ugly shoes you bought in the fall! Oh, but wait… you’ve got to put your shitty two cent opinion in about my thumb ring… three times… Thanks dear! I really fucking care what you think about it. I stay awake at night because you think it’s some kind of veiled announcement that I’m coming out of the closet! What in our cursed history together would give you the remotest doubt about my sexuality? You betraying, lying tart!!!
And when I asked you what you could possibly see in that fat, flannel boxer, plaid shirt wearing, boring old bastard; What I really meant was that you both deserve each other and that I hope you’ll live long enough to make one another miserable for the rest of your ethically bankrupt lives!!
SO FUCK YOU VERY MUCH!!!