So, on the 26th, one of my friends, who happens to be my boyfriends cousin and best friend in the whole world, died of AIDS. 
BF is in CA and I’m in WA, and he kind of closes down emotionally when he is grieving. So there’s nothing I can do to help him and man, it sucks!! So, tell me something happy - a story, a joke, something interesting in the news, the fact that you just got a new pice of toejam for your collection! Help mamakat get her mind off her problems. Thanks!
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because it was stapled to the punk rocker.
Best I can do. During the down time at a restuarant I used to work at, we were sitting around telling jokes, this one struck us as particularly funny for some reason. For the rest of the shift and through the next several of us would have only to look at each other and the hilarity would begin again.
My condolences, I’ve lost a few friends also.
I’m sorry for your loss.
The other day at work, a coworker says goodbye to a quadraplegic patient, “Take care of yourself!”
I thought it was hilarious.
I’m sorry, too.
Man walks into a bar…
That had to hurt.
Termite walks into a bar.
“Is the bar tender around here?”
HERE. “Is the bar tender HERE?”
No “around” in the joke.
In my defense, I’m used to being able to edit posts.
I’m sorry.
So. What did they call Emma when she fell into the pickle vat?
a dilemma.
How many Buddhists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One to screw in the light bulb, and one not to screw in the light bulb.
I’m so sorry for your loss. hugs
I’m sorry to hear of your loss.
What do you get when you cross a lemon with Tchichovsky?
A sour note
In the realm of silly things to read:
There’s this.
Or this.
Or this. (Though, some links in the thread may not be for the squeemish.)
And, finally, a pair of SDMB classics: Here; and here. Spew warnings on those last two links, btw…
My heartfelt condolences, mamakat.
(The link in my sig might bring you a smile.)
This isn’t a joke or particularly funny as one, but I’ve been looking on and off for smoe months now for this particular material and finally found it tonight using some terms I thought would fetch innumerable dead-end links.
http://www.geocities.com/pharsea/NotesOnBoswell.htm
http://www.libchrist.com/other/homosexual/gaymarriagerite.html
(Any detailed discussion of the material contained therein would probably be suited to a thread in, at the very least, another forum.)
Sorry for what you are going through. This too shall pass.
Okay. This is my best shot:
What do you get when you cross a donkey with an onion?
a piece of ass that will bring tears to your eyes
Thanks, guys. These jokes and stories are helping me to get my mind off things for a while. It’s so nice to know that there are people out there, who even though they don’t know me, care enough to try to brighten my day. Thanks so much!! 
i lost my brother to AIDs in '88. Terrible disease…
a horse waks into a bar. The bartender says “So, why the long face?”
This thread will help get your mind off of it.
BTW, there is a hurl factor with this one as well.
I’m terribly sorry…
What do you call a religious chicken?
Fryer.
So there are two muffins in an oven. One says “Boy, it’s getting hot in here”. The other goes “Ahhhh! Talking muffin!”
What do you get when you cross a Klansman with a Unitarian Universalist?
Someone who burns a question mark on your lawn.
C’est un petit gars qui écrit une lettre pour le père Noël:
Cher père Noël,
je vous promet que cette année je serais sage et je ne frapperai plus mon petit frère.
P.S. pour noël j’aimerais avoir des gens de boxe.
Translated from the French:
A little boy wrote a letter to Santa saying:
Dear Santa,
I promise that this year I’ll be good and I won’t hit my little brother anymore.
P.S. For Christmas, I would like a pair of boxing gloves.