He died last week of cirrhossis (sp?). (Can’t wake/bury during Holy Week). Like other funerals I’ve been to, didn’t cry; Bothers me, though can’t finger why. His daughter had many friends come. One was cute so had to leave the room (I was CHECKING OUT a girl at a WAKE!) Funeral is tomorrow.
Eric:
I’m sorry for your loss. Death is painful, but the pain affects us in different ways depending on the situation. Do not worry about “am I grieving correctly?”-type questions, everyone grieves in their own way, and at their own pace. I felt almost nothing when one of my grandmothers dies, only to have the impact hit me almost a year later.
I hope that wasn’t too glurgey, and I hope you feel better soon.
I had the same experience when my great-grandmother died. I wasn’t checking anyone out, but I was more concerned about my mother, who took the death hard. I hope you don’t mind my asking, but did you know your uncle well? Did you spend much time with him in his final months? That may be a factor. And I’m sorry for your loss.
Sorry about your family’s loss.
On a lighter note, I always think of the movie, “Four Weddings and a Funeral,” when I hear about funerals and weddings…
1st, thanks all for your codolenscense! KCSuze, Didn’t know him well, which is part of it I guess, regret not knowing him (or most family), better.
Update: his MIL died recenly, was waked last night, buried today (went to former/not latter). My grandmom (late uncle’s mom) had similiar experience 13 years ago (lost husband/mom close together).
My condolences, and you shouldn’t beat yourself up about noticing women at the wake. At least as I understand it, the sentiment of a wake is to celebrate life as well as mourn a death.
And behaving the way you feel is much preferable, and healthier, than an insincere display, acting the way you think you’re supposed to act. If you don’t cry, that just means that that’s not the way you deal with these things. It doesn’t mean you’re unfeeling. And people understand that, more than you probably think.