Sorry. Stay strong. Let us know if we can help.
There is little I can say that has not already been said, but I offer my deepest sympathies and wishes for peace to you and your wife.
I just saw this now, and I am so sorry. I never know what to say, except that I will mention you both in prayer.
One thing I always do say is take care of yourself. Be sure to get sleep and regular meals. One needs to stay strong.
Say whatever you need to here. What the heck are friends for?
I’m terribly sorry to hear this so late, silenius. I’ll speak for everyone here that we have your back. If there was a teleportation device, I’d beam over there to help you with chores and stuff so you could focus on being with your wife.
Tripler
Good at mopping floors, for you.
Just sorry, Silenus.
I feel like I should have more to offer, but it just comes out as self-indulgent word salad every time I start to type. So just my best to you and I hope you can come out okay some day.
I’ve no words of wisdom to share, my friend. You’ve got my number should you need counsel or an ear to listen. The Mrs. and I delighted in meeting you both in real life those many years ago.
Oh shit. I am so sorry. Every time I think 2020 can’t get worse, it finds a way.
Words fail. I am so sorry and wish I could do something to help.
Watch out for yourself as well. And ask for help. Or even demand it. Now is not the time to be shy. Say what you want, we’ll be here.
Silenus please write out all you want to or need to. We are here. I know I’m just an unfamiliar name on a message board but I do care. I’ve not lost a spouse (though I came very close to it) but have lost parents, and what I remember most about the extreme danger to my husband and the loss of my parents is that this time, these moments, seem surreal. Embrace that as a comfort, if you can. Also, if you can bring yourself to do it, accept the help people offer, you may need it more than you think you do.
I agree that no big decisions or changes should be made yet. Stick with your kitties for a while, and all of you get used to the new rhythm in your lives. A dog is not a bad idea either, but go a bit slowly there too.
I am beyond sorry for what you and your wife have been through recently and for what you are facing. Sending comforting, strengthening, sympathetic vibes your way, for use as needed.
@Silenus, if you would like some distraction at some point and if you are still considering a new dog, you might take a look at this thread, about a doper and his new dog. I think animals are about the best comforters and they never say the wrong thing.
I am so sorry to hear this. Sending warm thoughts to you and your wife.
The board informed me that @kayT linked to my dog-blog thread as a point of solace for @silenus.
Firstly, I’m heartbroken for you, my friend. I’m sorry to hear the news. Secondly, I’m humbled that my thread was in someone’s thoughts in this respect. I hadn’t intended it that way, but I’m glad it was.
In conclusion, I’m really sorry you’re going this shitty time, @silenus, but do know that dogs are awesome.
I don’t have any advice. I don’t have any way to make it better except to say that I’m thinking of you and praying for you (if that’s ok).
We welcome all prayers.
Total lock down of the hospital today. No visitors, period. But I had 10 minutes with her yesterday, and got to tell her I love her. When the door closed behind me I said Goodbye. So I’m prepared if she passes in the night or we can’t get there in time when she is forced into palliative care. I got to say Goodbye, and few of us have that blessing.
I also realized on the way to the hospital that I am no longer afraid of Death. I’m NOT suicidal, people. Relax! But I know she will be waiting for me on The Other Side, and will have scoped out all the good restaurants. That makes me unafraid.
Thinking of you. Please know we are all holding her and you in our kind hands.
I think it’s a real tragedy that there won’t be any contact with loved ones in their final hours these days. It must feel really dehumanizing and heartbreaking for a lot of people.
But I have been feeling less afraid of death lately, too. It’s hard to imagine what happens after one passes, but as my plans for my vacations for the foreseeable future have crumbled, I’ve imagined not getting to see my relatives for the next couple of years, and imagining them going on with their lives has made it easier to me to visualize the world continuing on after me once I am dead.
My prayer is for peace. For your wife, peace of passing. The hospital may be on lockdown, but know she is not alone. Her loved ones from the past have been gathering at her bedside, and when the time is right, she will rise and go with them. And she will never know pain again.
Peace for your friends and family. As they grieve the loss of her, they will stumble as they try to comfort you. Draw strength from the memories of her they share with you. Gather all those little pieces to you, and make them a blanket around your heart.
Most of all, peace to you. This is a special pain, known only to you, and now you must mold your life around it. Your wife will be gone from this world, but you get the comfort of having her in your heart, forever. She will be there, all you have to do is look inside.
~VOW
I’m very sorry to read about this , Silenus. Take care of yourself, too. Hope everything happens as well as is possible given the circumstances.
There is little I can say that has not already been said. I am deeply sorry that you are facing such a loss. Reach out if you need an ear to bend. The entire Board is willing to listen and just be there for you from afar.
I’m so sorry, what a terrible blow. I’m glad you have family there to support you, I hope they are a great comfort to you and your wife.