My wife taught our niece to say "Suck It!"

It was an accident. We were playing Yahtzee, and she got five 5’s, a Yahtzee. So my wife yells, “Yahtzee! Suck it, Uncle Joe!” So now the 6-year-old is saying, “We’ll suck you good, Uncle Joe!” No, I’m not even joking. When mom comes to pick her up, we’re gonna have to make sure she knows EXACTLY why she learned that phrase…

oh my… /facepalm

My sister is still pissed* 18 years later because I taught my niece/ her daughter her first word.
The fact that it was ‘meow’ was just the icing on the cake. :smiley:

*not really :slight_smile:

I love teaching small children how to do a Bronx Cheer.

This is what aunts and uncles are FOR.

Boobies!

Luann (comic) October 12, 2012

My grandson’s first word a few weeks back was “boobies”. My daughter is refusing to write it in his baby book.

Is your daughter named Ellie, and do you play in an 8-man fantasy football league? :smiley:

Not my first words, but when I was two or three my Aunt taught me to say, ‘‘I love Duran Duran’’ over and over and over. (Yes, it was the 80s.)

A story about one of my acquaintances, which I believe, incidentally, based on experience, is that he intentionally taught a friend’s baby the word “puta.” Supposedly as a first word, which I am less certain of.

Not her first word but my mom likes to tell a story about my sister. Dad, Dad’s brother, Mom,and Sis were in the car. They stopped someplace where it was decided that it would be easier if my mom just ran in. Everyone else waited in the car. When Mom got back my father and his brother were frantically coaching my sister "no, no ‘truck’. We said ‘truck’ "

Lo these many years ago I taught my youngest god-daughter to say ‘HU-ah!’ any time she saw a uniform. Her father was not amused when he got back from deployment. He was hoping for ‘daddy’ :stuck_out_tongue:

I guess my advice to kid relatives about getting a job on fishing boat and eventually working your way up to a master baiter were wrong?

My sister used to have a Volvo station wagon. When my oldest niece was little, she told everyone that her mom drove a Vulva.

So what kind of mileage did she get with it?

My cousin was getting 18 inches per stroke.

Though she did have a hybrid.

My son(now 25) was taught to say fuck while riding as a 2-3 year old with another friend’s mom. She was a terrible driver and used this every time someone pissed her off.

We had a heckuva time curing him of the habit.

Glad this isn’t a debate over whether you should teach kids to say things like that.

I’ll have to ask my parents if I ever picked up anything like that.

My oldest sister’s first complete sentence was “I’ll be a son of a bitch!!” Said loudly in front of company that included two nuns, from what I am told.

I haven’t thought of that story in years. Now I have a nice giggle going.

Then again, I am the woman who endured the shame of having a small child in a car seat blurt out “Oh, for fuck’s sake!” About 2 years later, I endured the exact same shame when my second child said the exact same phrase. If you has asked me pre-kids who would have the hardest time not swearing in front of children, I definitely would have said my husband.

Not even close.

Many years ago, a friend had a baby boy; her brother kept him overnight and returned him to mom at church the next morning. He had taught the boy to say ‘fuck-shit-fuck-shit’ repeatedly. My friend tried to convince her priest that the kid was saying ‘truck-ship-truck-ship’. Not sure the priest bought it…

My aunts and uncles were terrible for things like this. The first one I was old enough to remember was when they taught my cousin to say “Eat shit”. He ran around the room screaming it and dancing every time they laughed. All the fun came to a screaming halt when my grandmother arrived and she did not laugh. Neither did any of her children. Poor cousin was very confused when his performance got such a decidedly different review.