My brother is a wreck.
He has a bit of a learning disability, so he never did well in school, despite being very bright.
He therefore dropped out of college (that’s community college for you yankees) after one term and began a life of debauchery.
He has had the occasional job tending bar, or serving, but he can’t keep them. All he seems to want to do is drink and party with the few friends he still has who haven’t yet moved on to bigger and better things.
This enrages my father. He can’t accept the fact that his son is a failure. Also, my brother is SO SELF-CENTRED that he refuses to listen to anything we tell him (which is also because the manner in which we do so is bound to make him defensive) and so he and my father fight all the time.
My mother refuses to allow my father to kick him out of the house, although I don’t think my father actually ould do this.
We can’t seem to find any consequences that will cause him to stop being such a jerk, and my mom, child psychologist that she is, seems to think that we need to have positive encouragement to raise his self-confidence, rather than negative reinforcement.
- What to do?
- What consequences, short of kicking him out of the house, can be applied?
- What kind of job can a bright kid get into without an education?
- How do you talk to someone who is really defensive? (and don’t try to tell me about “I-Messages”)