I would love to know the Spanish for “hold the newsreader’s nose squarely, waiter, or friendly milk will countermand my trousers.”
Sujeta la nariz del presentador de los informativos directamente, camarero, o leche agradable revocara mis pantalones?
My favorite word in Spanish is “estacionamiento,” which means “parking lot,” with a close second to “chicharones” which means pork rinds.
So here you go:
Me gusta bailar con mis chicharones en el estacionamiento.
I like to dance with my pork rinds in the parking lot. (or more literally, “It pleases me to dance with my pork rinds in the parking lot.”)
Also, my brother’s favorite (he doesn’t speak Spanish, but knows this phrase) is:
Tengo chicle in mis pantalones.
I have gum in my pants.
¡Espárragos!
¿Es amor?
Me doy cuenta
amor no es Espárragos.
¿Por qué?
Peru, you say? “Where is the birthplace of Cole Porter?”
Just correcting the general case of spelunkin’…
¡Dios mío, tengo un hacha en la cabeza!
Si no hace un buen trabajo, le encerraremos aquí con las cucarachas, dos semanas a pan y agua. (That’s actually “with only bread an water”, but the thing is, nobody would threaten with no bread and no water)
No me das miedo, cago cachos de tíos como tú.
¡Tengo dos gatos en los pantalones!
Dame el piano, por favor.
El queso está viejo y podrido.
And by the way, and someone might actually catch the reference, el gato está triste y azul. (the cat is sad and blue)
¡Ay Dios mío!
Tu madre se ha comido mis uvas.
Dentro de poco, las ardillas habrán conquistado el mundo entero.
Mis herramientas ya tienen bastantes habanos.
Chicharrones, that one actually has one of those hard Rs.
“Mi tio es enfermo, pero la carretera es verde!”
From Cheers: “Help me! I have been hideously mangled in a locomotive accident!”
And the ever classic “My postillion has been struck by lightning”
Can’t help you with the Spanish versions though…
Curse you! I came in to suggest this one.
From here:
http://www.madcoversite.com/quiz_olympics.html
(second panel on second page. A classic!)
This my favorite to use on newbies:
[ul]
[li]Explain that “como” equals “how.” Examples: “Como estas?” “Como te llamas?”[/li][li]Explain that “mucho” equals “much.” Examples: “Mucho gusto!” “Tengo mucho hambre.”[/li][li]Explain that naturally, “como mucho?” means “how much?”[/li][/ul]
Then set the person off to a local market area and hilarity ensues.
Donde estan mis zapatos fritos.
Where are my fried shoes.
I was hoping you’d show up. Thanks Nava!
Nava’s already come in and corrected both of us, but I knew this one as “el queso esta viejo y mouldy.” Probably because we didn’t know the Spanish word for “moldy.”
In case anyone’s wondering, here’s what I ended up sending her:
Thanks for the help, y’all! I suppose that if these go over well, I might send another batch a little later, so feel free to keep thinking up more. And if anyone’s interested in translating any of the proposals so far in the thread, I’m sure that would go over well.
I remember that routine! The only Spanish phrases he could remember from two years of college Spanish were:
“Mi tocadisco esta descompuesto.” – “My record player is broken.”
“Que lastima, hay dos chicas en la cocina.” – “What a pity, there are two girls in the kitchen.”
As I recall, he later also remembered:
“Donde esta la playa nudista?” – “Where is the nude beach?”
This is a good follow up to this one: Tengo que vomitar.
I have to vomit.
La gente está ansiosa. Dentro de poco, se alborotan y empiezan a tirar chorchadas.
Bueno, voy a entretenerlos con mis chistes de Polacos.
?A cuantos Polacos les toma a comerse un burrito?
So from the sincerity of corrections, am I to assume I am the only person who remembers “Encino Man?”
Probably for the best.
Back when dinosaurs roamed the earth and I took high school Spanish, my teacher took great delight in warning us about stuff like this. His favorite example was ordering a glass of milk in a restaurant. If you asked the waitress “Tiene leche?”, the connotation was “Do you (personally) have milk?”, and you were asking her if she was breastfeeding.
The proper way was “Hay leche?”, “Is there milk?”
I’m too lazy to figure out how to code the upside down question marks.
El gato que estaaa, triste y azul, nunca se olvida, que fuiste miaaaaa