In a similar vein, the maintenance guys at work got their calendars this year. Another year with bikini models proudly displayed in their lunchroom. I don’t know why but it kinda squicks me out. I should have thicker skin.
No, you should not have a thicker skin. This is not okay for a workplace.
I would cut out little paper outfits and glue them on over the bikinis. Prairie dresses and long pants.
As of this afternoon, it’s only in one prominent location. Yes, I have pictures of it, and they’re stored in a safe place. This kind of “joke” is really out of character for this manager; his abuse of text formatting is not.
We haven’t had to deal with girly calendars in the common areas in about 15 years, and the “DEEZ NUTS” sign someone put on their cube wall was taken down after only a couple of days, so I guess that’s progress. I would be soooooo tempted to display an Australian firemen calendar, but no doubt I would be the one to get in trouble.
We did have a customer service rep who thought it was the height of comedy to show up for work on Cinco de Mayo in a sombrero, serape, jeans with a big belt buckle, and cowboy boots. He retired last year. To my knowledge, the closest he came to being reprimanded was the time the general manager asked if he was going to wear the outfit all day.
I am really trying to keep a stiff upper lip here. I am really trying to maintain a can-do attitude. I feel like the infrastructure at my agency is crumbling around me. I’m like that guy on the Titanic still playing the violin as the ship goes down. I got a wonderful promotion after seven dedicated years working part-time and thought, “Yes, I finally made it. This is where I want to be.” Now people are quitting in droves. We can’t find replacements because the Powers That Be refuse to pay people at market rate. My boss, my mentor, one of my favorite people, and critical to my success, quit last month. We are limping along with a skeleton crew, we don’t even have much of a leadership team left and the person at the helm is brand new and wildly inexperienced. We are losing program directors left and right. I just found out our finance department has been dissolved and will be outsourced to a firm.
This place is unrecognizable to me. I don’t know anybody in the building. Due to COVID, I’m hardly ever in the building. The majority of the “Old Guard,” the experts, the wisened ones, have left. There is just me, trying to channel their ghosts as I am pushed to help make the kinds of high-stakes decisions they did about the future of this agency.
Meanwhile I am doing new stuff for the first time and way out of my comfort zone. I’ve struggled over the last couple of months (this is my ADHD speaking) to figure out ways to organize, prioritize and get shit done now that my workload has doubled.
So the task for me is to figure out how not to let it all get to me. Because I don’t actually want to leave. I’m finally getting paid what I’m worth. The hours are incredibly flexible. The work itself is great. I’m fiercely connected to the mission. I just don’t understand what’s happening. It feels like the apocalypse.
Did they retire, or move to a company that isn’t showing signs of incipient implosion? If you’re still able to contact them, try to get them to give you their impression of the future trajectory of the company.
They are definitely bailing due to executive decisions. I don’t think anyone is seriously worried about the agency going under (it’s a nonprofit), they just don’t want to be a part of it anymore. Part of the turnover is due to the low compensation, part of it is due to ideological differences with executive leadership and the board of directors. What I’m worried about is our service numbers taking a hit, also other things beyond my control like VOCA slashing funding in half and moving to a competitive process the very year I begin this expanded role.
I am trying not to catastrophize.
There’s nothing I can do, right? Just keep my head down and work and think about the people I’m working for.
… and think about yourself, too.
I get that you’re emotionally attached to the work and what you’re doing, but … do keep in your back pocket a reminder that there are other jobs - and other worthwhile missions - out there.
I just don’t want to see you burn out.
What purplehorseshoe said. You’re well loved around here, and we do not want to see you rip yourself to shreds over this.
A very, very admirable position. And something to be proud of.
I appreciate that. Thank you all for your support.
I wish I could explain what’s connecting me to this place. It’s not just the mission, though that matters to me a lot. It’s that I’ve been doing this job for seven years and just kind of treading water. Nothing was demanded of me other than what I was already really good at doing. I had it very easy.
It’s hard, and it’s painful to see what we’re going through, but I can’t deny I’m experiencing rapid professional growth and after so many years of stagnation it feels good. I’m being pushed into making strategic decisions, speaking up, and generally being tested on a leadership level, whereas for many years I just hid behind my computer.
To use an example of how this is such a mixed bag, today I was brought in on a planning meeting and I learned something that genuinely shocked and upset me because in my opinion it is egregiously bad. But nobody knows it’s egregiously bad because they haven’t been around long enough to know. But because of the new role and my opinion suddenly mattering, I had the ability to speak up on behalf of survivors, to voice that this needs to change ASAP, and I was heard. I even got to connect the agency with someone I know who can help.
And I genuinely believe if we correct this problem, it will save lives.
So on the one side it’s like God, it’s never been this bad. I mean we’ve had turnover and all kinds of crazy shit over the years, but never to the point that we’ve lost the transfer of decades of expertise like this.
But on the other hand, I always felt so helpless in the past when things were happening and I couldn’t do anything to help. I felt helpless throughout COVID because I couldn’t put in the volunteer hours to help cover shelter because I had an infant who needed protecting and a husband who didn’t have the bandwidth. I felt helpless when everyone hated our past CEO and four of our executives quit in one day and blah blah blah. Like so many things just happened where I didn’t get to step up.
Now I get to step up.
I’m not saying I don’t have limits, and I’m monitoring my stress levels appropriately, but there are a number of factors contributing to my current stress, including things like constant viral illness making it difficult to get work done in the first place, much less exercise and getting up early to do self-care and all that shit, plus Januaries are fucking crazy in the grant cycle no matter how you slice it, and I’m still learning how to do all the new stuff.
How it will shake out in the end, I don’t know. But I’m going to try and see what happens.
The absolute worst case scenario is it all goes to hell and I go back to trying to launch a fiction career.
I feel ya. You’ve put in the time and now you have the experience the organization needs. You matter! and it’s people like you that make things happen. Step up, or otherwise you’ll have regrets about what could’ve been.
But don’t let the organization devour your life. Hold firm on your work-life boundaries. One of the benefits of leadership positions is that your example is meaningful. By keeping a healthy work ethic, you make it easier for others to stay healthy as well.
Don’t worry about the absolute worse case. Our economy is restructuring, which is scary, but despite the layoffs in the news, many places are actively hiring.
I was asked to be a presenter for a discussion series. It was a 1 hour virtual format. There were 4 presenters who each had 15 minutes. Questions were held until the end. Our notoriously long winded Director provided an opening introduction. Using the new math we can now put 75 minutes into 1 hour!
I was the last speaker. I had 6 minutes to present, then question/answer time went 15 minutes over.
Our IT manager fixed the problem. Turns out it is a bug that is several years old but micro$oft never has bothered to fix it. The solution was simple: Turn off preview panes and edit the registry so that they didn’t automatically turn on during start up. It sure seems like a low level software engineer could fix this bug, but I suppose that’s for a whole 'nuther rant.
I like our CEO. I do. But if I receive one more follow-up email saying, “Let me know if there’s anything I need to do for this!” I’m going to scream. Every. Single. Time. we get a notification from MDHHS she forwards it to all the people who have already received it with this comment.
Lady, this is my job. I promise I will tell you if there’s anything I need you to do.
Is it an honest effort to help or more of a, “I want everyone to think I’m supportive but really, don’t let me know.”
In the case of my boss, it means “I regard this as a priority, and so should you”
It is my job to make this a priority. I don’t need anyone telling me to make it a priority.
And yes, she genuinely wants to help… She is new and doesn’t know what to ignore yet. At least I hope she will start ignoring it soon. It’s gotten to the point where I no longer CC her on emails about anything she doesn’t need to know about.
But I can’t control what the system sends her. She is authorized rep. Which means the only thing she ever has to do is hit the submit button on applications. But I don’t need her all up in my reporting business.
It does take time I think. Often it is best to keep your eye on things and not try to become another cook in the kitchen. THAT can turn into a mess. “Baking Powder? I though you said Baking Soda?”
I’m creating a new logo/graphic for another department. I sent them a few options, and now they want to add several new concepts that are hard to represent visually. 
It’s not even worth putting a lot of time and effort into it, because very few people will see it, and nobody else will care.
I’ve designed a couple hundred logos in my day, and had that happen (usually with non-profits that aren’t paying much to begin with).
A couple times I’ve gotten away with “Okay, here’s a second round. We’ve incorporated your feedback, but there were a few concepts that just didn’t work.” Then quick start discussing the logos I DID bring with me.
(I didn’t lie… I did try their concepts, but as a 15-second pencil sketch.)
Yes, there were times they wouldn’t give up and one time I ended up having to put their boss’s Pit Bull “Jojo” in the logo… smiling, yet.
I fought so hard, even said “Are you prepared to print new stationery when Jojo dies and the boss gets a poodle?”