Alright: My new sister, Meghan (almost 17) walks by my room one Saturday afternoon, and what does she see in the wee morning hours (around 1pm or so - wee morning hours for ME anyway)??? My underweared ass sticking up in the air.
Mmm…underweared ass. Anyway, She comes closer, looking to make sure I was okay - and geez, my right foot was perpendicular to my face and my ass was waving about in the chilly morning air. Can you believe that? And to top this little escapade off, about a half hour later Meghan comes a-strolling back up the hall, looks in my room - - there I am, in the same exact position, except on my back this time. How the hell did that all happen? Hee, hee - AND WHY CAN’T I BE THAT FLEXIBLE DURING THE DAY??? Well,that’s what I get for being stoned off my ass before going to bed, dammit.
I’ve woken up in some pretty interesting positions, but that’s one I’ve yet to find myself in.
BTW, your wee hours sound a lot like my wee hours.
I told you not to dream about ballet!
And how come I’ve never seen this?!?
I’ll second Monster.
MMmm… flexibility and underwear…
–Tim
…And chilly morning air…
(See, poetry writes itself.)
And someone who’s named both her breasts . . .
LOL!!! Well, how could I dare let them go through life without an identity of their own? 
Though of course it would be far more strange if she’d named just one… 
Underwear? Who wears underwear to sleep? Ugh, that’s just damned uncomfortable for me. Then again, any clothes while sleeping is. But I do wonder why I’m more flexible in the late hours than in the regular ones also.
Besides slumbering with an unfurnished basement ssskuggiii my dear, you’ll find that it’s better to be that flexible late at night. Trust me, it’s more fun that way.
I’m just wondering if you were trying to attain a higher form of unconsciousness by attempting yoga positions in your sleep.
I’ve woken up in weird positions, too, but I can’t remember a time when I had my ass in the air.
Well, of course there’s been times when I’ve been awake and my ass… uh… nevermind.
I fell asleep on the night of my birthday lying backwards off the edge of the bed. I was woken 6 hours later, I was still in the same position. I swear, my back was bent 90 degrees the wrong way.
I fell asleep once on my stomach with both arms folded underneath my chest. Needless to say, when I woke up I had two dead, useless arms, and couldn’t roll myself over. I had to shout for my sister to come in and roll me over. Needless to say, she had a hell of a time pinning me down and slapping me senseless about the head and body with my two useless appendeges (sp?).
We were such a loving family. And if you’re wondering how in the world could my younger sister pin me, keep in mind that’s she’s 6’4" and about 170 pounds of pure muscle. She’s a fucking amazon.
Well…since I normally refuse most type of “coverage” upon sleeping, Meghan was very lucky this was one of those rare nights in which I DID wear my PJ’s…hee, hee…Otherwise, there could have been problems.
Well if they have their own identities, then it seems kind of rude that they haven’t been officially intoduced to the board.
See, this is why I sleep with my door closed and everyone who stays at my house and not in my room knows not to disturb me.
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Well if they have their own identities, then it seems kind of rude that they haven’t been officially intoduced to the board. **
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Hmm…you have quite a good point there. I might just have to follow through on that one… (evil grin)
For you, my little wolfman ;): http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=41435
Hey, Enjoy!!!