Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we happen to conceive.
your turn
anonymouse
You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him get into a bathing suit.
I’ve used this one a number of times:
You can lead a (insert victim’s name) here, but you can’t make him think.
or:
If at first you don’t suck seeds, fry, fry again.
As seen in someone’s sig (hope i get it right):
Imbibo ergo sum
Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, and I’ll cap ya.
Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on you. Fool me thirty-five times, shame on me.
(From “3rd Rock From The Sun” I think)
You can lead a horse to water, but you are now gay.
(From my friend.)
You can lead a horse to water, but you are a stupid bloody moron who has no right to exist a sentient being.
(From my friend.)
Well, I can’t stay. Things to see, people to do.
If I’m not back in five minutes, wait longer…
I’ve lost my mind and gone looking for it. If it comes back before I do, keep it here until I return.
Therein writhes the grub.
And The Lord spake unto Moses, saying “Go forth, and multiply”.
But he came fifth, and won a tea-set.
Jesus SAVES…and tosses to Peter!
If at first you dont succeed, skydiving’s not for you.
There are few problems in life that cannot be solved by the suitable application of high explosives.
Landmines are equal oppourtunity weapons!
My cat’s breath smells like cat food.
More to come… 
I’m out to pillage the women and rape the fields.
Drive defensively: buy a tank.
You can lead a horse to water, but if you can get him to float on his back you’ve really got something.
Always remember to pilliage before you burn!
There’ll be more… oh - by the way: love the explosives one, Mnem.
Another good one from 3rd Rock:
“Guns don’t kill people, physics kills people!”
You can’t pull the wool out from under my nose!
Despite the high cost of living it remains popular.
What if there were no hypothetical situations?
Roses are red.
Violets are blue.
That’s what they tell me
Because I’m blind.
wild horses on bended knees couldn’t persuade me.
Grasp the nettle by the horns