Mine is not a situation like this one, where someone did violate traffic law but wished the officer had gone easy on him.
Here’s the situation: at 3:34 PM, I parked my car, got a Muni-meter (that’s sort of like a parking meter, except instead of it being right in front of your car, there’s one for the whole city block and it prints out a recipt which you display on your dahboard to indicate when your time is up) slip showing my time expires at 3:54 PM. I then go into my desired store, and things take longer than expected. So I leave temporarily and return to the Muni-meter. The meter says 3:52 on it. I put in a quarter for another twenty-minute stretch, and look over at my car.
A police officer is writing me a ticket.
“Excuse me officer,” I say politely, “is something wrong?”
“You’re over your limit,” he falsely tells me.
“No, I’m not,” I say, pointing at my previous slip. “It’s not 3:54 yet.”
“It is on my watch,” he tells me.
“The Muni-meter says 3:52,” I tell him. “The slip goes by the Muni-meter time. Come, look,” I offer, indicating the machine just a few feet away.
“My watch is good enough,” his falsehood-filled tongue unleashes on a disappointing world.
I run to the Muni-meter and retrieve my receipt. “See?” I pointed out to him. “It says ‘Start Time 3:52’! I am not over my limit!”
“Then fight it in court,” says Officer Asshole McDonald, placing his vile orange creation on my undeserving windshield.
So ends the tale of my woe. Sometime next week, I’ll take precious time out of my day and go get a judge to dismiss this clearly imbecilic ticket. In the mean time, Officer Asshole McDonald is merrily writing tickets based on his Famous Fast Watch ™. And all I can do is impotently rant about it here.
Officer Asshole, I hope your mistreatment of the citizenry is soon uncovered, and you soon merit a one-way trip to the unemployment line, needing to spend your unemployment insurance checks on tar-and-feather remover.
There, I have Pitted the scumbag.