October is turning into a hell for me.

Who was that guy that said bad news don’t attack alone, but in battalions?

So far this month has showed: a disgruntled coworker appearing at work drunk and with a gun, a girl whom I was attracted, recently gave me the “let’s just be friends” speech; a relative was killed in a hate crime in Phoenix, an infection in my sinuses, a brother that just joined the ranks of the unemployed, and my aunt just died this week (pancreatic Cancer)

Surprisingly, I am hanging on, maybe it has been my sense of humor and the pragmatic view I have of life, but I don’t want to drift into despair, I know no one can guarantee it will get better, I only need a little of your points of view, so I can put things in perspective.

Life goes on, it just that I was concerned that recently there were several threads that I started and I had no chance to reply last week, I thank to all those that replied and the ones who gave good information, things will get better soon (only 10 days more to go for this cursed month).

[sub]And it is still 100+ degrees over here, where is fall? damn it![/sub]

Well let me tell you my story…

Today was my second anniversary.

The day after I got back from my honeymoon, I was in the hospital with a foot infection. My diabeties had gotten out of control. I had to have surgery on my foot, then two on my left eye and one on my right. I lost sight in my left eye.

I spent 4 months out of work, luckily my job has a long term disability beneift so at least I got something.

The stress of dealing with this almost made my wife leave me.

That was the first year of my marriage.

The second year has been great. No new ailments, no surgeries, and now the marriage is strong and healthy.

Keep up the sense of humor. It certainly helps.

I’m sorry to hear about the troubles you’ve experienced. :frowning: You seem to be coping quite well, so hang in there.

Thank you for your thoughts lavenderviolet; wow Odinoneeye!, I congratulate you for your fortitude. That was the kind of thing I needed, it does indeed keep things in perspective.

You got the sinus thing too?

Tell me–how long did it take for the antibiotics to kick in?

I’ve been using mine since Feiday, and while I feel a little better, I still feel like sh%t.

You wanna swap?

A year ago my wife was diagnosed with Parkinson’s; early stage, so she was given medication to add to what she was currently taking for her diabetic neuropathy. Last February she fell down the stairs and screwed up her back - more pain pills. Then, just after our 20th anniversary at the end of August she started forgetting where she was, and over the course of the next month she spent more and more time just laying in bed. After a week in the hospital for tests, it was recommended that she go to a nursing home - except that my insurance won’t cover that, so we took her home and I arranged for day care while I’m at work. She won’t eat, do her exercises or take her medicine, but just lies in bed listening to the TV. Next week we were supposed to go to Las Vegas for a belated 20th anniversary celebration.

And just to add to my aggravation, last night my neighbor pounds on my door screaming about how I left my sprinkler on too long and flooded his basement. He’s one of those self-important assholes who’s always talking about who he knows so I just know he’s going to make trouble about this.

damn, LurkMeister! how long would you have to have had that sprinkler going in order to flood the house next door??? i for one would expect something to show up on your house lot before it got over there. (unless the grading of your respective lots is pretty darn interesting. but still…) personally, i’d bet dollars to donuts that your jerk-next-door is trying to pin something on you that might actually be caused by him.

GIGObuster, you have my sympathies as well as my empathies. this month is capping off a less than stellar year. last week we had to fly out to Ohio for my aunt’s funeral. she’d been diagnosed earlier this year with lung cancer that spread to her liver. she only told us about it in July. and this was just about a week after i’d sat with my very aged First Pony while they put him to sleep. he’d been diagnosed less than a week earlier with West Nile virus, and needed daily vet visits and home-administered medications up until the end.

and that was just 6 months after i’d gone through having my oldest, best horse put down on April 1. the coming of warmer weather retriggered breathing problems he had, to the point where he was collapsing from oxygen depletion.

i’m hoping Halloween will cheer me up a bit.

I am getting better now, the antibiotics did kick after a week.

No, I would not want to swap, but looking at the big picture I wonder…

I only wonder because even with all the suffering you are going trough at least you had several years together, Me, I am still looking for the one and so far my life is the one of a wanderer, that wants to settle down and never has had a meaningful relationship in his life, so yea I do wonder.

Chances are, in my later years the one I love or I could suffer a similar fate, yet even if I knew our fates I would still have gone for it, for it is better to love and suffer because of love, than to never have loved.

You have my sympathies.

I am sorry about your horse.

Don’t know how old you are, so this may or may not be relevant, but after several disappointing relationships I had pretty much decided I would be spending the rest of my life as a solo act. I met my future wife through a local Star Trek /SF club; we started sharing an apartment more as a matter of mutual convenience than from any romantic interest. The transition to love and marriage was so gradual that to this day all I can remember about it is that we started planning a wedding.

The current situation is the latest in a series of health problems that started about eight years ago. Ironically enough, we used to joke that we had gotten married so she’d have health insurance (having lost her job and not being able to find another). Would I have married her if I’d known this was going to happen? I honestly don’t know; I was pretty self-centered back then, and if someone told me “You can have love, but at some indeterminate time in the future you’re going to have to watch helplessly while she has a lingering illness” I suspect I’d have said no. Do I regret having married her now that it has? No, although obviously I would have preferred that it hadn’t. My biggest regret is all the things we kept saying we were going to do “later” and now probably never will.

Love sucks, but not having it sucks even more.