Oh no, I have a cult.

How can I describe this:

Ever remember in junior high or in high school, where you go over to your friends house and hang out? Then when the friend’s older sibling come home, you think that they’re the coolest person on earth, and try to mimic everything that they do?

Well, it’s happening to me, but I’m the older sibling.

My brother has these friends, and they LOVE everything about me. I’m still not sure why they do, but they do. Recently my brother admitted that they have started mimicing all the phrases and words that I say most. It’s almost to the point where they’re worshiping me, like a cult. I didn’t mind this at first, I’m a little flattered that these guys think I’m so cool.

But now, it’s getting to the point where it’s starting to scare me. Today, someone with a screen name similar to mine started talking to me and said all this stuff that only I would know. Also my brother says they want to know EVERYTHING that I do. This is not good. I told my brother to stop telling them stuff that I do and I blocked all of their attempts to talk to me online* or off.

Is there anything else I can do for them to leave me alone?

[sub]* I deserve this, since I blindly give out too much information about myself online[/sub]

Louie, talk to them, confront them, ask them if they are doing this. If they admit it, tell them you’re flattered, but it needs to stop. Or maybe you could say that it’s a little creepy, and it’s something you’d never do.

Tell them that a cool person is someone that is comfortable being themself, rather than imitating another person. If they try to be (insert name of someone currently cool to teenagers here), the best they can do is be a copycat. If they try to be (insert bro’s friend name here), they’ll be the best in the world at it.

Of course, if they deny it, and you’re sure they’re doing it, then maybe you’re just dealing with a little smartass, in which case a dope slap is the best remedy…

Swallow you’re pride and do something really dorky in front of them. Kids are fickle so they will instantly drop you and go worship somebody else’s big brother.

Mold them to your every will. Convince them you are learning several different forms of fighting, taking small amounts of poison to boost your immunity, working out to become super strong, and becoming good at using all kinds of weapons. Soon you will have a band of mindless servants ready to die for you. I can’t think of anything cooler than having large and deadly men fighting for whatever you want. (This could take a few years to work effectively)

Or, you could do what the other people said.

Before people become upset and think I’m crazy I would like to state that this is a joke.

Joke, Schmoke.

Tell them they are obviously very perceptive and intelligent young fellows. Much more so than those OTHER people around them, the ones you all laugh at behind their backs, like their teachers and the popular kids. Tell them your philosophy of society and politics and that everything would be fine if your ideas were put into practice, except that there are “certain people” keeping down the best folks like you and, of course, them. “Certain people” like…like…like their parents! Who want to control them and keep them from achieving their true potential as human beings, rising above their enemies and wielding power from their seat at your right hand. Well, ONE of them will be at your right hand. The one who shows the most drive and willingness to accept your wisdom. You can teach them and train them and make them strong. They need only heed your wise advice. (You’ll have to set an example with one of them at this point, to show what happens to those who doubt you).
Devise a uniform.
Demand a show of commitment in the form of worldly posessions, theirs and their parents, which they will not need in your New Worldly Paradise.
Groom followers to take positions on the school boards and in other key strategic jobs on the level of local politics.

When you need to know what to do next, let me know and I’ll give you some more guidance. I know you’ll be able to pull it off. You and I, we’re so much smarter than these idiots.

I’m with APB. I’m with APB. I’m with APB. His name is Robert Paulsen.

:: Shakes head ::

Oh! Wait a minute… Anyway, I say, if you’ve got the power, abuse it! Make them buy you Taco Bell and deliver it to you every day. I had some groupies when I was a senior in high school. They were my GF’s brothers and their friends. It’s amazing the things you can find for them to do. They’ll wash your car, go to the store and buy smokes for you, go get you food (the old, “you fly, I’ll buy” trick works great with them.) Anyway, just don’t buy them alcohol, like they’ll eventually want you to. You could get in big time trouble for that. Oh wait, you’re a minor too. Nevermind that, instead, make them score booze for you!

Obviously you have to stalk them and arrange for a scary scene where they shit in their pants. Then you tape it and pass it around to their friends.

no? then I have no idea, bnever had that problem. Only had one groupie and she was a little overweight and I was never rude to her, but would not go out…

young kids…thats a problem…