You came into a thread where VB challenges me to a fight and you thought there might be family entertainment here?
I would take it to e-mail, but then someone might think it was serious. This way everyone knows it is for fun.
Trkr
Aww, Spidey, don’t go!
Unlike a certain commander in chief, I’m sure he can be persuaded to keep his pants on; besides, your posts have been very entertaining. So, I say let’s keep it clean, huh?
As for GBS, trekkieboy, I’ve always believed in letting the ladies decide.
Congratulations! Here; have a cigar! 
I do not have a problem with keeping it clean, I however am running out of cartoon violence type things to type.
Be my guest and I will try to respond in kind, but I am at a lack to initiate any cartoon antics at the time being.
Spider? Purple? GBS? VB? Ogre? Anyone else?
I appologize if I have offended anyone young or old.
Jeffery
Spidey and the younguns are just returning from a triple feature of “Charlotte’s Web,” “Spider Man,” and “The Incredible Fly.”
(I guess everybody’s families are different.)
Now all the little spiders want to play, too. Is anyone else back yet?
Yes, SpiderWoman. What cartoon antics can we dream up today.
BTW, nice choice of flicks. 
Trkr
All the spiderettes (who want to be incredible flies for Halloween) are wearing their new mylar and cellophane wings.
“Oh goody!” they all squeal, spotting Str trkr. “Wanna play? HuH? ““Ya wanna?”” See our new wings?”" Where is everybody?"" My wings are better than hers!"“No they’re not!”“Yes they are!”“Are not!”“Are too!”
Spidey, grinning wickedly says, "Say Str trkr, old friend, would you stay with the children for just a bit while I take care of the bill for that compressor and air hose attachment at the Rental Company? Seems they had some questions about damage to a truck. . . "
Spidey exits, leaving Trkr covered with lots of happy little spiders. . . Bwee tee hee
-----
—////\\
VB walks up to Trkr;
“No offense taken, just don’t want to run any Spiders off!”
“Didja enjoy the seegar?” VB asks Trekkieboy, to distract him as he ties a rope around his neck, which leads around the corner of the house, up the drainpipe, over the roof, down the chimney, up the stairs, out the attic window, back over the roof, into the tree, down the branch, into the knothole, out the base of the tree, through the drainpipe, around the doghouse, through the bird bath, over the fence, across the fresh poured concrete, down the street (against traffic flow), into the steel mill, out the furnace chimney and into the field, where it is attached to the high speed winch.
VB presses the remote control button, starting the winch. Trekkieboy disappears with a “whoop!”.
::Crash! Bang! Rumble rumble! Beep!::
“Owww! That’s gotta hurt!”
“There; that’ll keep him occupied for awhile!” VB says ,as he sashays off to find Purple.
All the baby spiders, who are clinging to trekkie boy, shout “Wheeeeeeeeeeee! Let’s do it again!” Trekkie boy sees lots of little spiders flying around and around his head, in amongst the little chirping cartoon birdies.
Purplebear slowly wakes from the drug-induced sleep, and looks around to discover that apparently Trkr has settled on GBS, and her likewise; Spidey and kidletts are up to more mischief <as is appropriate for such creatures, nice though they be>; Smoothy has left a mysterious package under the upside down tree; and VB is still attempting to get Trkr and permanently win this ‘fight’; and Ogre, Thespos, and pipefitter seem to be MIA.
Wondering how she could have been drugged, she suddenly realizes that the only foreign contact she has had is her pretty, slivery web bra. Why, that rascally Spidey!! Looking around, she spies several purple bras laying around <hey,it’s a cartoon, anything can happen!;)> and tries on several till finding one that fits, sorta. Hiding behind the upside down tree, now unoccupied, she uses the solvent Spidey gave her to dissolve the web bra. Putting on the new one, she then saunters out just in time for the mysterious package to explode, sending purplebear reeling backwards. Suddenly seeing numerous frat boys coming after her, she takes off running in the general direction of the caves, only to trip on something and fall flat on her face.
OOOMPH
Help me, someone!!! Before those frat boys catch me! :eek:
Poor purplebear. If she weren’t purple, and a bear, we spideys might think she is related to the arachnid family. We spideys have lots of legs to trip over.
Spiders all decide to weave purplebear some beautiful silvery kneepads and elbowpads. They skitter away for a while. . .
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—////\\
As Trekkieboy disappears over the rooftop, VB turns in time to see frat boys charging after Purp, and decides to do something about it.
He hides beneath a bush, and as Purp runs by he pulls a hole out of his pocket, and tosses it on the trail just in front of the frat boys, and takes their credit cards just before they fall through with a wail.
Pocketing the cards and the hole he walks away. “There; That’ll stop’em from charging!”
He hums an old tune as he sets off after Purp.
“By the light, of the silvery bra…”
Thank you, Spidey, for the offer of the kneepads and elbow pads. Most kind of you. And, yes, I sometimes wonder, as many things as I keep finding to trip over.
And, VB, GROAN. Bad pun.
Still waiting patiently for someone <HINT! VB!> to come untangle her legs, and help her up.
So, where did the other players run off to? 
Hullo, Purp, whatcha doin’ down there?
“Whoa, I didn’t realize you could put your leg there!
ne’er mind, let’s get you untangled.”
VB hums softly to himself, “the foot bone’s connected to the…leg bone, the leg bone’s connected to the…hip bone, the hip bone’s connected to the…oh my!”
Ok, up on your feet; all better now, sweetie?
Standing on her feet, clinging to her rescuer, the ever-resourseful VB; purplebear leans closely to him for a bit longer than is strictly necessary. And as for what my hip bone’s connected to… well, let’s discuss that in the cave while we’re getting the supplies.
Ok, now. On to plan…what?..F or G? No matter, purplebear grabs VB’s arm, and they head off down towards the cave, and the secret cache of cartoon weapons that are hidden in one of the caves. On the way there, they hear a strange noise coming from behind them.
Turning quickly,they see…
…A zillion spiderettes, dragging knee and elbow pads!
“Look miss purpplebear! We made them for you!” They shout excitedly…
. . . the sounds of a gazillion baby spiders, who think they’re being, oh so sneaky. Their erstwhile babysitter, Str Trkr, is making like jb_farley and snoring loud zzzzzzzzzz s, recovering from his wild ride.
“There’s no one left to play with!” they wail, when they realize they have been discovered. “Mom isn’t back yet! We’re HUNGRY!’”
VB and purplebear offer to let the spiderettes tag along to the caves.
“Oh no!” they shudder. “No one ever comes out alive from those caves! You will be eaten by the giant ______!”
StrTrkr sits up. He is a bit groggy after the wild ride.
Where am I he thinks. And why do I feel like I have been through a meat grinder?
Trkr remembering the ride he just endured, decides to build the mother of all cartoon booby traps.
Trkr finally finishes what is destined to be known as a masterpiece of trapdom.
He is standing there admiring it when …
Trkr
Spidey returns and wants to know where trkr left all the kidlettes. She is tapping several of her feet, waiting for an answer. In the meantime, VB, purplebear, and all those naughty little spiders are sneaking up on the unsuspecting conversants, with the heretofore uncaptured giant________ in tow (it was no match for VB and crew).
Spidey, seeing them approach far too late, cries “I’m your mother! Show some respecccccccccccccc. . .”
At this point trkr, who was counting on the distraction, releases his booby trap. . .
-----:eek:
—////\\
…Catching a few boobies, bras notwithstanding…
What a diabolical trap! How cruel! How rude!!
All the spiderettes wince in unison, clutching their as yet undeveloped breasts.
Suddenly finding herself caught by her boobies in Trkr’s diabolical booby trap, purplebear cries out in pain, anger and astonishment.
<cover your ears now, don’t say I didn’t warn you!>
AAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHH!
Not wanting to struggle too much in the grip of this dastardly trap, purplebear stops moving and tries to figure a way out of it, without hurting any tender parts. VB, having been knocked down some distance from the rest by the blast of the trap going off, is also making his way back to pbear and the other unfortunate women. Then, she notices coming towards her in the distance, something <or someone> very large…