My mother, who is 79 years old, 14 years post-triple bypass, and a lifelong hardcore smoker, is experiencing a sudden extreme decline in mental functioning.
We know that both her carotid arteries are severely blocked, one almost completely, the other some ridiculous amount like 60%. They have been this way for some time. She is generally quite frail, has lost interest in food, has even lost interest in smoking, and has very rapidly started to get very strange in the head. She’s talking about my dead sister and her being drunk last night, she’s forgetting things, she talks as though she’s hullucinating. She hasn’t lost all her faculties, but she’s definitely lost a lot.
We are all relatively adjusted to the big picture that she’s letting go of her life, but still I wonder… could the mental losses be attributable to the limited oxygen reaching her brain? Could there be some other physical explanation?
And finally… any information, advice, or experiences my fellow dopers can share with me about the slow decline and departure of their loved ones, i would appreciate. I get the feeling that my mom is sorta committing passive suicide, that she’s lost interest in life and is just kinda… letting go. Am I wrong? Have you seen this?
She lives a couple of states away, I’m visiting in June. I have the strong feeling that she’s kinda readying herself to die while I’m there. That’s pretty much exactly what my oldest sister did.
My mother just had a drop in blood sugar for some reason. They found her unconscious and a shot of glucose got her started again. Could low blood sugar be causing mental changes?
Stoid, first of all, let me say how sorry I am to hear about your mother. My mother died three years ago (I can’t believe it’s been three years already). She had early onset Alzheimer’s – diagnosed at 60, and she died at 65. So I have a sense of what you are/will be going through.
Loss of mental capacity and dementia are very common in old age, and it’s possible that they are completely unrelated to the condition of her arteries. Many, many people have these symptoms with clear arteries.
It is possible that she has lost interest in life, but it is also possible that she just no longer has the capacity to express herself. The most frustrating thing about this is being unable to verbally communicate with the person. My mother was unable to speak for quite a while before she died, though there were certainly other forms of communication happening. I think my biggest fear was that one day should wouldn’t recognize me, but thankfully, it never came to that. Toward the end it did seem like she was ready to go – she stopped eating, drank very little – but we discovered that she had a stroke a few days before she died. Sometimes we read into things that may or may not be there.
My only advice is to spend time with her when you can and just be there for her. It’s hard when you are far away (I was a few hours away), but you do what you can. My thoughts are with you.
Find a good hospice organization. They can help you through this process and, when I was going through this with my mom (who died a year ago next week), I found their assistance and input to be invaluable. They washed and massaged her, sat with her when I couldn’t be there, helped her deal with the concept of dying. They told me a lot about what to expect as she neared death, and - probably most importantly - the rights she and I had to allow her to die without a lot of interventions. She had PSP (what Dudley Moore just died from), and it wasn’t like she was gonna get better. It helped to have permission to take her off antibiotics and finally oxygen at the end. The nurses with the hospice program told me all about which interventions and procedures would make her most comfortable, and that’s it. It was a big help to us. Being with her as she left this world was an extraordinary experience.
There comes a point when you will need professional help in looking after Mama. It’s a 24 hour job that one person cannot do. So, yes, what Jill said.
Alzheimer’s?
There are four million Americans diagnosed with Alzheimer’s according to the Alzheimer’s Association. Roughly 19 million people have a family member suffering from the disease.
I lost my Mother to this 10 years ago August.
Be there for her. Hold her hand. Remember when the roles were reversed when she held yours.
Thanks for all your kind thoughts. My mother has had a stroke, we’re not sure when. (My sister died of stroke complications…) More info in the morning, and it looks like I’m going to be heading out some time in the next two days to go spend some time with her.
Thanks, everyone.
Stoid
PS: Jillgat, we were all with my sister when she died. I highly recommend it, and frankly, I hope my mother dies while I’m there, rather than a few days or weeks after I come back. I would prefer to be there as she shuffles off this mortal coil…
My father had blocked carotid arteries. In his case he started having TIAs (“ministrokes”) although we’re sure the blood loss in parts of his brain affected his moods, at the very least.
There is a relatively simple operation to clear the blocked arteries, which might give some relief – or at least keep things from getting worse. Sad to say, it’s not without risks. My father had it and during the surgery, a small bit of blockage broke off causing a full-fledged massive stroke. He died 10 days later.
In asnwer to the second question, yes, blood surgar levels can dramatically affect memory and mood.
Sorry to hear that your mother is not doing well. I agree with the others in this thread that several possibilities exist to explain your Mom’s decline in mental function.
Alzheimer’s is possible, but so is multi-infarct dementia. Given your Mom’s history of coronary and carotid vascular disease, MID is a strong possibility.