Online friend advice

Alright, I dunno what to do - I’m one of those people who seems to attract people in need of support and love. I’m not saying I don’t love helping people and getting them back on their emotional feet but the last few online females I have helped get over different issues have ended up with the Florence Nightingale effect and been head over heels for me.

Me being the level headed down to earth guy I am continuously try to remind them gently that I only know them online and they often live hundreds of miles away, yet they continue to seriously carry the idea of holding a long term relationship with me. Twice I’ve had to talk the girls (who often are not financially sound yet on their own) out of taking a road trip to come see me and thus put themselves into possible financial trouble, not just difficulty.

I try to be soft and gently discourage the more than flirting actions, but I’ve made the mistake of just letting it run and ended up seriously hurting a friend when I explained that there wasn’t anything between us other than friendship.

So, the question is - how do I handle this? Do I tell them straight up from the beginning it’s all flirting and jokes? Or do I softly let them continue on and gently let it run its course? Or what?

You tell them straight, right from the beginning, or as near to it as you can, ronincyberpunk. The Net can be a weird and wonderful fantasy land as it is – honesty is the best policy, regardless of hurt feelings.

Just – be diplomatic.

Perhaps you could make it clear that you’re “not available” for a relationship. You need not lie and say you’re married, and yet it lets them down gently.