people who just can't STFU

The BBQ Pit
1

What the fuck is with people who can’t get to the fucking point and half to run their goddamned mouth when there is nothing to say? Seriously I have a senior manager working for me who is genetically incapable of just shutting his fucking mouth and either letting someone else talk or, god forbid, let everyone have five minute of silence so we can actually think.

I have had a shitty couple of weeks, with no days off. So yesterday, I decide to knock off work while it was still light out and head to the beach. I invite Yakky Mcyakerson (YM) because we all live in a guesthouse and he’ll know if I don’t invite him.

So in the car over there, “madmonk, we need to get a letter written to this one government official to ask him to help us do this thing,”

Me: “okay, well is this something we can talk about tomorrow morning? I’m in my swim trunks and don’t have a computer with me.”

YM: “Tomorrow is fine. Tomorrow is good, in fact we could do it on Friday or even early next week.”

Me: “Okay, first thing tomorrow then.”

YM: “That would be excellent, yup, fist thing tomorrow, that would be fine, unless of course blah blah fucking blah

So we get to the beach and I am crispy burnt out. I just want to float and look at the sky and watch the birds. It’s a beautiful spot. How do I know it’s a beautiful spot? Because Yakky has to keep telling me how beautiful it is every five motherfucking minutes.

YM: This is beautiful
Me: yes it is
YM: really beautiful
Me: yup
YM: So nice
Me: ………
YM: people would pay money for this kind of peace and quiet
Me: I know I would

Today, he wants the letter written and signed.
YM: Remember that letter?
Me: Yes, I’ve written it, once we print it on letterhead, I will sign it
YM: The letter is important
Me: I agree
YM: He will help us now that he has the letter
Me: I hope so
YM: It is good, the letter, yes?
Me: yes it is fine
YM: Once he has the letter, we will know if he will help us
Me; Get the fuck out of my office (not really, but if I don’t get some STFU time soon I’m going to get a little stabby).

Why the fuck can’t some people just get to the point and then when they arrive at the point, stop? And people like this are also oblivious to any kind of body language or social clues that they are making people crazy. With Yakky, I have had to say in a meeting: “well I think Sue can answer your question if you just stop talking and let her.”

2

My stepdad’s like that. Nice guy, but listening to him making a phone call has always been painful…

ME: “Hi, I was wondering if it would be possible to change my Monday appointment to a Wednesday one… I’m really sorry, but something’s come up… oh, great! Thanks a lot for that! Bye now.”

MY STEP DAD: Good morning. I have an appointment for Monday. My local doctor was gonig to make it for me, but he had to go out of town, so it was Dr ------ instead. You know, the new one who’s just come up from Melbourne? Yeah, him. Anyway, I’ve got my car in for repairs, and the mechanic told me it’d be ready on Saturday, right? But what happened was… um… there’s a part they couldn’t get. The part is available, but their usual courier is away that weekend, and…"

3

I aggree these peole are the worst!

Take it from a customer care agent, whos both on phone and email, nothing worse then wasting several minutes listening / reading a crappy storry just to at the very end get the keyword that tells you what to reply! jesus! Morons!!

4

You Talk Too Much.

5

You really half a way with words.

6

Oh, stop flapping your guns. :wink:

7

Somehow this makes me think of those ridiculous translations you used to get in poorly subbed SNES games, a long string of completely superfluous text with little content.

I had a cow-orker like that, she just liked listening to herself for the most part. You couldn’t have a decent conversation without her butting in and hijacking proceedings with a “yeah, well, I was…” interjection to let us know it was now her conversation :rolleyes:

8

People who incessantly talk are usually insecure.

I married into a family like that and have given birth to one who is an incessant babblerer.

I also bowl with a yakker and it is near hell once a week for three hours.

These people will never change. They can take any subject on the planet and drone on and on until you are in a stupor.
They don’t get it and I’ve decided ( after nearly 20 years of living in the trenches) it is a mental condition. Like OCD. Stream of Consciousness Verbal Diahrea. I hate spellling that word.
When my son is older, and if I haven’t been able to mold him into a less chatty version of his father ( who now sees just how bad it is ) and his grandfather ( who is the Gold Medalist for 60+ of Empty Talking) I will drag him into counselling.

9

And another thing he does is when we email back and forth he comes into my office to talk about the email.

YM email: let’s extend Fred’s contract another month.
My email: okay

Then he comes in and says good we are extending because we need him and he is a good worker

Me: I know, that is why we extended his contract.
YM: That is good because blah blah fuckity blah blah blah
Me: I agree, we are in agreement, there is no disagreement between us, and hence no need to keep talking about the lack of disagreement.

I agree it stems from insecurity. He is also an huge braggart which I find is another sign of insecurity.

10

I think most people know someone like this. That’s probably why the character Kelly on The Office is so grating and funny at the same time. Because people can relate to that and say “gah, Kelly drives me crazy, she’s just like so-and-so, just can’t shut up.”

11

If they stop talking, their brains start working.

12

Exactly; I think some of these people are utterly terrified of being alone with their thoughts. Makes you wonder what the heck the thoughts that terrify them are, especially when it seems like none of their thoughts go unverbalized.

13

are you two from radically different cultures?

my guess is he is just trying to get closer to you and does not know how to do it.

14

Obligatory Python video (skip to 2:30)

15

*Well I lay out in the afternoon I start to nappin’,
you walk into the room with them jaws a-flappin’
You keep that motormouth moving morning, noon and night,
you keep on talking baby make my head turn white
You talk too much,
I can’t believe the things that you say everyday
If you keep on talking baby,
you know you’re bound to drive me away *

  • George Thorogood
16

[hijack]

I have 2 coworkers who are exactly like this. They cannot stand each other and don’t realize that they’re more alike than not, especially on the talking-incessantly thing.

They cannot stand each other but they go on breaks and lunch together. Why? Because the mere thought of spending any time by one’s self is terrifying for both of them.

If either of them (not both) are working, they will try to latch onto me whenever I take my breaks and/or lunch. They are mystified as to why I’d want to spend that time alone with a book or newspaper. They try not to take it personally because they know I’m not excluding them on a personal level, but trying to explain that I take my breaks/lunch alone for a reason goes completely over their heads.

One of these women is divorced with a teenage son who works nights. She automatically runs to her sister’s on those nights because, as she says, “I just can’t be alone. I just can’t.”

[/hijack]

17

Beautifully put.

There are several people here with this problem. They say something, you agree in a manner that lets them know you have actually heard and understood. They say it again, wording it a bit differently this time. You nod and congratulate them on their hard work as you get up and open the door for them to leave. They say it a-fucking-gain, etc. I soon run out of things to say and just look at them as they repeat themselves for a while and gradually drift away. It still takes a really long time and they don’t even notice when I quit responding, but at least I save myself the effort of looking for the magic words that will get rid of their ass.

18

:smack:

19

I imagine that when they stop talking, they get an annoying sound in their heads such as the drone of a mosquito, or maybe a tone like when there’s a test of the emergency broadcast system.

20

We are from different cultures, but believe me that has little to nothing to do with it. He has no interest in getting to know anyone. We have someone from his culture who can’t stand him either. Some people are just jerks.

If you ask someone else, “heh, how is your daughter doing?” He starts talking about what a sportsman scholar his son is, a true genius everyone else’s kids are shit in comparison to the demigod his wife shat out. No interest in anyone else’s life or opinion. What’s sad is, he’s not very good at his job. He basically regurgitates what his staff tell him to say. I’ll ask his people directly for what’s going on and then later that day he comes scurring in with stale info like it is a revelation.