Personally having a rather hard time at getting dates the old fashioned way, I occasionally break down and try an online personal. THe problem is, I occasionally run into trouble with those as well because I’m not sure how to do a personal while divulging the right amount of information.
So…for those who have been sucessful at this sort of thing, exactly how much is effective? Any tips for posting personal other then that?
Well, I can’t say as I’ve been “successful” with personals, though I have had eight dates through them, which was nice after having been through an ugly divorce.
Myself, I’ve never been good with the “match.com” model of internet dating, which it sounds like you’re signing up for. I was on for some time and received a whopping zero e-mails and not one of my e-mails was answered. So, I’m probably not the best person to answer you. But, the people in this thread might be. A number of them have linked to their profiles, and there’s some good ones there. They may give you an idea of what to write.
Personally, I would not want to describe everything about myself. I would prefer to leave some element of mystery. But, at the same time, I would want to hint about that in my profile. I suppose it’s a balancing act…I guess there’s no definitive answer.
I recommend that you post some kind of info, because you will definitely get zero responses if all the categories have “ask me,” “ask me,” “ask me.” What’s so effin’ top secret about your taste in music?
I personally am not looking so much for the specifics as an overall sense of the person – though, of course, some screening is going on. If the ad is all in caps or filled with misspellings, I don’t even read it – and though I will forgive one or two typos, proper spelling and punctuation count for a lot with me. Go ahead and list some of your favorites (books, movies, ice cream flavors, hobbies) – because presumably you’re looking for a woman who either shares these interests or doesn’t have a problem with them. So, yeah, I’m going to pass on someone whose musical tastes run to disco and soft rock, or who can’t remember the last book he read, or who’s looking for a gal to attend monster truck rallies with him. OTOH, I would probably respond to a guy who listens to a lot of jazz, collects mechanical banks, or reads mostly books about Tudor history, even if these aren’t interests I share, just because the fact that he has these interests make him sound like, well, an interesting person.
You may want to avail yourself of the Doper Critique-A-Personal service – post a link and people will check out your ad and comment. I did this last fall sometime and got some excellent suggestions; I’m currently dating two really different but equally (dare I say it?) interesting guys – neither of whom shares my taste in music. (Here is the final version of the ad.)
Thanks for the advice, both of you.
I finally wrote one and posted it on the provided link, though thus far have not gotten back any feedback(probably because of the sheer number of ads being posted. Either that or my link doesn’t work).