I hate when people cannot understand me when I state my name. It is Grant. Here’s just a sampling of the names I’ve been called:
Brad
Graham
Gran
Brant
Mark (piano teacher called me this for about six months)
and just last night at Jamba Juice: “Ran”. Yeah, I’m named after the Kurosawa movie.
Sometimes I try to help people out by saying “Grant…as in ‘Ulysses S. Grant’,” and they stare at me like I’m speaking Martian.
Then there’s the spelling of my last name. It is Henson. Yes, I know there are variant spellings, so I’m always careful to spell it for the person. Never sinks in; I get Hansen, Hanson, Hensen, etc. One thing I try sometimes is to say it’s just like the Muppet guy. That rarely helps, because they don’t know how his name is spelled either (people evidently never read, they only watch TV).
So you hate when they say: “Like, I went to this like, Club? And there was like this guy who like, kept looking at me? And like, he was cute? And like, he asked me to like dance?”
I like, know what you mean. I like, hate it, too.
I hate people who beep when you don’t risk life and limb to get into traffic. Especially if it’s at a red light and there’s a car sized space between all the other cars. Or if there’s someone crossing the street in front of you. I mean, just where the hell do you think you’re going?! Do you HAVE to get to the next red light before me. Sometimes I fantasize about ramming into the old lady crossing the street and crashing into 4 cars causing an explosion so I can look at the wretched beeper and say “OK? Are you happy?” but assholes like that would just drive right through the rubble so they could be first in line at the next light.
i mostly agree with (i think it was) robert frost, who said something along the lines of “writing poetry without a form is like playing tennis without a net.”
freeverse is the worst thing to hit the literary world since i dont know what. just because you write some flowery prose and cut it up into short little lines, THAT DOESNT MAKE IT A POEM. i’m not even saying that people need to write all sonnets or sestinas or rubyiats - blank verse is fine, but for goddsake, METER, people, METER!!!
it literally pains me to read bad poetry. or to see someone write a bad poem and have other people say “oh, its so beautiful!” it’s not. it sucks. unless you are t.s. eliot, your free verse poems will suck.
meter.
a steady rhyme scheme.
enjambment.
refraining from using the same tired cliches that every other so called “poet” in history has used.
if you can somehow incorporate these things into a poem, you are automatically four steps up on the rest of the depressive, melodramatic, indistinguishable poets that are wasting paper and ink on their bits of unmetered, sappy drivel.
i cant even say how much of a pet peeve this is for me. i feel like banging my head against my desk just writing about it.
I hate it when TV news reporters are ‘live on the scene’ when the event they are covering has been over for hours (and they play a recorded and edited report also)
I hate when the first car at a stop light is surprised when the ligh turns green!!!
People talking over the TV drive me nuts. Now I know that social interaction is generally preferable to staring at a telly, but what I’m talking about is when the (say) three of you are watching something really interesting and other person #1 starts to loudly address other person #2 about something they’ve just seen.
Other person #2 breaks into a raucous cackle and replies twice as loud, the interruption continues, and the net effect is that I lose some vitally important part of the plot of whatever it is we’re all watching.
Worst of all, once they’ve finished they invariably ask me what just happened while they were busy squawking at each other. I don’t know! You made me miss it too!!
My wife and her best friend are the usual offenders. I just count to 10 under my breath and wish I had a private TV room.
To me, there is nothing worse
Than a poem that is writ in free verse.
I said that I think
That free verse poems stink -
They are an unmetrical curse.
you’re right. (and i mean it. i have argued with friends against a standard set of values for art, or whatever it is.) to me, free verse poems stink. my earlier post was in the spirit of posting what your pet peeve is, so mine was a small rant about free verse. i was stating my opinion, which is: i dont like sappy free verse poems, and no matter how many people say ‘oh, it’s a good poem,’ i will still think it sucks. you can like them, like you said, but they drive me crazy.
one persons chocolate ice cream is another persons shit on a stick, so they say. this particular one is my pet peeve, is all : )
While I understand your point, some of us live in the city where slowing down at a green light is vital to survival. You can never be sure that some asshole won’t decide that the red light doesn’t apply to him and sail right through without so much at a glance at cross traffic.
Well, I have an entire peeve FARM, but here are my best in show:
People who chew with their mouths open so you can see and hear every morsel. It’s really the sound that grates on my nerves. Crunching, smacking lips and slurping are the best ways to find my foot in your ass.
1a) Commercials with this in them. I’ll dive for the remote whenever a potato chip ad is on TV–and there’s a new Kix commercial with a 3-y.o. practically dribbling milk down its chin.
Lack of turn signals. I mean, do you really expect me to believe that you paid $30,000 for a car and it doesn’t have turn signals? Especially when changing lanes. C’mon! It’s not only stupid and rude, it’s fucking dangerous!
So-called “Reality” shows. MTV started it with Real World–now, how realistic is it to get a dozen punks who don’t know each other together in a house where the rent, food and utilities are paid for? I don’t think so. And don’t get me started on Temptation Island
Really bad grammar. I work with someone who doesn’t know that “done” isn’t the only way you can conjugate “to do.” “I done, he done, she done.” At least he doesn’t say “done did.” And saying “where’s he at?” makes you sound like a fucking hick. But chances are, if you say that you are a fucking hick.
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…not that I have anything against fucking hicks
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People who call and don’t leave messages. When I get home and my caller ID has three “Unknown name-unknown numbers” on it and there isn’t a message on my voicemail, WTF? Did you want to talk to me or not, putz?
neutron star and cjharker, my rant was aimed at specific people to whom I am related. I have this argument with the fam all the time and it was them I had in mind. And they are cheap, just ask them!
I don’t give a rat’s ass where you spend your money, to be completely honest with you. It’s your money and I have no right to tell you how and where to spend it. Conversely, I’d like to enjoy the same luxury. I’m a designer kind of gal. It’s just a part of who I am. I’d like to be able to shop that way without my cheap family saying “Hmmmph, Armani Exchange. How much was that?” Well except for my Mom, she’s pretty cool.
But since it’s always my response when someone says fuck you to me, neutron star: Fuck you, too, buddy!
Reuben, may I join you in your private TV room? I swear, I will not utter a single word.
My husband sounds like your wife. He makes me nuts. And he isn’t talking to someone else, he’s asking me questions about the show.
“Aren’t they married in real life?”
“Is that character going to die?”
“Why did she say that?”
“What happened to that other girl?”
“Isn’t that the guy from that movie?”
And on and on…
I could just kill him sometimes!
People who forget how to drive in snow. This is Michigan, folks! It snows here every year, without fail.
Now, I’m not a good snow driver. I learned this quite a while ago. Because I know this, I’ve made adjustments, so I don’t put anyone else’s life at risk. I do my best to either stay off the roads or ride with someone else who actually IS a good snow driver. I’m being nice to you by keeping my bad-snow-driving-self off the road–why don’t you do me the same courtesy?
I do understand, though, that sometimes, you have no choice. You must drive in this shit. Fine. But please, I beg of you, don’t fucking pretend the roads are clear and drive like you normally do. Dammit, they’re just not safe. I won’t bitch about you driving 10 MPH when it’s safe enough to do 30, just so long as you’re not driving 60 when it’s only safe enough to do 30. Just slow the hell down. Err on the side of caution. Please!
That’s the other thing! What telly needs, possibly as some advanced features on the remote control, is a computerised searchable list of spoilers and sundry related facts to whatever programme is showing; especially for the benefit of people with short attention spans such as our respective SOs.
Preferably it would be controllable only via the teeth or tongue, so the user couldn’t talk while they were using it.
The words “grotty” and “hubby.” Especially “grotty.” The 12 year old girls that use this word should learn to speak English like the rest of us.
Watching a movie that I’ve already seen with another person who hasn’t, who insists on asking me questions about it. Usually my answer is, “You’ll see,” or “You’ll find out later.” Answering these questions would ruin the movie for you! Just shutup and let the movie tell the story, not me.
“Cute” kids and the “cute” things they do. I don’t even want to get into specifics. You all know what I’m talking about.
Who’s shamelessly pandering to our emotions this holiday season? Why, the GAP, of course. “Give and Receive”? C’mon, like the GAP is going to give us true happiness by bringing us closer to our fellow humans.
People who use the word “tolerance” to talk about attitudes toward homosexuals. This is a very minor peeve, because the people in question would almost certainly be on the same wavelength as I am as far as the issue is concerned, but the word “tolerance” is offensive to me. It’s like they’re saying, “Yes, I know gays are a pain in the ass ( ) but we’ve gotta put up with them.”
) but we’ve gotta put up with them.”