Helm.
Or Beverly. Q actually did turn her into a dog.
“So.”
And when he walks the dog and is impatient for it to poop already, he can say “Make it, So!”
I was thinking, “Number two, Number One. Make it so!”
So, I’m watching the episode Pen Pals. Picard and Deanna are having a conversation on the way to the holodeck. Picard states that he is not overly fond of small animals, preferring the company of horses instead. He states that a good horse is a companion rather than just a pet.
I was going to say “Number Two.” Highly appropriate when doing walkies. 
Of course.
“Shut up, Wesley!”
“Into your travel kennel, Wesley, we’re going to the vet. Surgery day!”
That only works if the dog is a little bitch.
I like the mentioned idea of Q, but I’d be worried using the name would summon the bastard.