Really, Cnote? Then please explain to me exactly why RevisionistHistoryChannel, Bossk and grirnpixie took the opportunity to take their unprovoked swipes at me (here and/or in other threads). I am asking a direct question, and they’re offering me back-handed side-swipes (although kudos to anyone who has said supportive things so far).
And dalovindj has some kind of persecution complex and thinks I’m out to get him, when my last flame to him in the AM/PM thread was about all I had to say, yet he continues to dig at me in various threads. He is, indeed, one of the people I’m kindly asking to step off. (There are two others I’d ask as well, but they’ve already been banned.)
If I say something here and people want to respond in a negative way, fine, but a constant barrage of unprovoked snipes in various threads is working my last nerve. Eventually I’ll get back to not caring, but at the moment, it’s just kind of annoying.
Esprix, you know I dig ya, and I’m on your side. I offer some advice, that you ignore nasty comments. It’s too easy to get involved in nasty, petty snipefests around here, and it does you no good to be drawn into them. Just walk away. You and DalovinDJ need to just ignore each other and stop getting into personal vendettas with one another. You are both cool, beautiful people who need some space and time to step back and chill. Who knows, maybe you both could be friends someday.
I’m trying to avoid that by starting this thread. Hell, I started the warmgun thread 'cause of his sniping - rather than snipe back, I wanted to ask him directly to find out (and my general rule of thumb is “if it’s posted in public it should be responded to in public,” but, indeed, there are times when e-mail is a wonderful thing). So by this thread I’m trying to (a) not to snipe back, and (b) put an end to it. I should have known it wouldn’t work.
I’m not. I said what I had to say, but he seems not to be finished.
So, people are picking on my good friend, Esprix, and he
does not know why. Well, based purely on observation both
on SDMD and IRL, I offer the following suggestions.
Last Word Syndrom - Esprix has always preferred to have
the last word in an online argument/discussion/flame fest.
This, I believe, is due to his desire to always defend
himself. I have noticed there are any number of
times he has said his “final say” only to post something
else when someone responds to his “final say.”
Low Tolerance for “Fools” - Esprix said it himself best.
He does not suffer fools gladly. If someone is acting out
or making a poor fool of himself, Esprix is often quick to
point it out. Mind you, he often sprinkles a liberal dose
of clue in his rejoinders, but not everyone is
appreciative of being told they’re wrong, not matter how
sweet you make the medicine.
Easy Target - Many people know that Esprix will respond
defensively to any post that has something negative to say
about him. There are people who like causing trouble, and
look for people who respond easily to slight provocations.
The combination of these two factors means that there are
many people who enjoy taunting Esprix just to get a rise
out of him.
High Visibility - Let’s face it, Esprix likes to post.
He is witty, eloquent, and always has an opinion to share.
He’s pervasive throughout the message board. He’s also
quite popular with quite a few supporters. Being
a part of a minority that causes irrational negative
reactions from some members of our society does not help.
By being so visible and “out”, he creates animosity in some
people simply by being who he is.
Now, I’m not saying the Esprix needs to change any of these
behaviors. None of them is necessarily “right” or “wrong.”
However, I feel that each of them helps to explain what it
is about his behavior that attracks detractors
like the proverbial flame for the proverbial moths.
My advice to Esprix would be to develop the ability to say
“Whatever!” more easily and dismiss those not worthy to be
responded to; shrug and laugh at those who seek to get a
rise out of him; concentrate more on having fun and
less on what fools have to say about him. Esprix is a
terrific person, and there is no shortage of people around
here who feel the same way I do. Next time he should
simply say, “I don’t care what that fool thinks; The people
who matter know better.”
Heh. I know there’s at least one poster reading that post of yours, jkusters, who is either laughing maniacally or biting their tongue off, but we’ll never hear from them about it…
Anywho, all points well taken (damn you for knowing me IRL!). Still, it’s just fucking annoying sometimes.
I couldn’t begin to explain their motivations, Esprix… at least right here and now. It’s obviously something, or otherwise it wouldn’t be going on.
The truth is, ‘the what it is’ I don’t know enough about, or care about either way.
But if there’s one thing I do know, or have at least seen around here before, is that threads like this aren’t going to stop it… especially when you continue to egg them on.
I can’t think of where we’ve corresponded much around here before, but I’ve seen enough of your posts to at least understand a point of view that believes you can be bull-headed in some of your posts.
That is, I’ve seen you make sweeping comments on things and then take offense when people call you to the mat on it (At least that’s my very limited feeling and perception of the matter. Hell, I’ve done that around here too, but I’ve eventually gotten to a point where I decide to let it go, or at least decided that further arguing is fruitless).
But, if you’re going to dish it out, then expect some of it to come back to get you. When it does, it doesn’t help to start ‘lay off of me’ threads like this one- it’s just fuel for the fire.
In an odd kind of way, it’s like the taliban and some of their comments lately- ‘Try to fuck with us you worthless bastards. I bet you don’t have to courage to come after us. We laugh in your face, cowards!!’. Two minutes later ‘Hey, you can’t do this, get out of our land, this isn’t fair!! Sure, you come in here with your technology and stomp us, but we’re a caring and loving society. You guys are mean! Unfair! Unfair!’.
Now, obviously, I’m not comparing you to the Taliban, but it something so understood right now that it might make sense to you why people want to go after those kinds of comments… especially if they have some risidual anger towards you right now, which, it seems even more obvious to me that they do right now (The posters that are snipping at you, that is).
You only need to be reminded of certain other poster around here who got him/herself into a load of nastiness by starting these threads. You were apart of those threads, and you had some good insight too-
Take this post for what it is- it isn’t a jab, a bitch, or even a criticism really, it’s simply saying that you might want to reconsider this counter-attack… it’ll get ugly fast and I doubt it’ll make you feel much better.
No doubt! But for every person who I know is not worth my
time, there are a dozen, like yourself, who most definately
is. I’m sure the same could be said by you.
Frankly, I had hoped I could vent without getting into specifics, but everybody wants those links. I suppose one really can’t vent about things that happen specifically on the SDMB and keep the participants anonymous.
No, ya think?
I was gonna say…
Sadly, you are correct, sir.
That’s the part I couldn’t understand and was hoping for some kind of explanation for, but, yes, you’re right - all it’s done is served to invite others to do the same.
As to my quote, I’m not depressed nor in need of counseling - it’s just annoying me. Again, I posited the OP as a general kind of vent/gripe, not an invitation to start a flame war. But as to this:
Perhaps I need to be reminded of that, but two things come to mind when I read that quote - first, there are times, IMHO, when things posted on this board should be addressed, and that is specifically when your honor, name or reputation are being slighted. In this case (random sniping for spite’s sake), yeah, that can and should be ignored (under normal circumstances, but as I said, I was trying to vent about the fact that it’s been happening quite a bit over the past few weeks, and it’s been annoying me), but if you’re going to start spreading malicious lies about me or trying to drag my name through the dirt, I’m going to defend myself. Granted “those who know” will know better, but, just like we continue to argue with the moon hoaxers and the Radical Right to fight ignorance, I’m going to continue to fight against ignorance that besmirches me personally. Second, my thinking has changed a lot over the past few months in regard to this board, particularly after attending a few Dopefests, and I don’t really see this place as “just a message board” anymore - but then, that’s another debate entirely.
Yup - hasn’t so far. I will e-mail a mod to close it if they deem so fit.
Thanks for the input, all. I suppose I will have to console myself with the fact that, indeed, “those who know, know.”
