My friend and I were discussing what we thought the ONION was going to post this week. They’re legendary for never holding back, and for incisively finding the sometimes-unpopular insight behind our tragedies.
Examples: “Columbine Declared Safe For Bullying Again” and “McVeigh’s Execution Brings Oklahoma Bombing Victims Back To Life”.
But Tuesday’s events represent a new challenge for them, a tragedy of unprecedented proportion (in the USA). Will they say something funny? Of course they will. Their whole raison d’etre is to use humor as commentary, and as members of a free society they can. And many of us will read it, including me.
But is it tasteless? I don’t think so. For many humor, wry and dry and bittersweet as it is, is a valid coping mechanism. Some may find WTC jokes offensive (as many of us found NASA Challenger jokes offensive) but I think humor is a way for us to look at ourselves, redefine what remains of us, and explore how we’ve been changed. So. To those who think this thread is wrong to exist, please do not read further. I truly intend no harm or aggression against anyone’s suffering. There are many other threads in which to discuss the serious side of this event, and I have spent much time there and found great discussion.
For others, I invite you to use or add to this thread in the way that you find most helpful, to be creative in a weird but therapeutic sense, to look at this all askance just for a moment because I for one need a break from looking at it directly—it’s just too big.
Incidentally, many of the following were inspred by SD thread comments in other threads.
Our suggestions for ONION headlines:
Trump Offers to Replace WTC with Big Statue of Self
Guliani Declares Permanent State of Emergency
“Street Crime Eliminated” Mayor Boasts
New WTC to be Giant, Armed Adamantium Robot
Japanese-Americans to Be “Interned” Immediately
Class Action Suit Filed Against Box Cutter Manufacturer
“Irresponsible Weapons Dealers,” Say Grieving Families, Johnny Cochran
NYC Rats, Cockroaches Celebrate “Victory Over Humanoid Oppressors”
Pentagon Vows to Build New, Bigger Hexagon
Manhattan Condo Owners Sue over “Rubble Eyesore”
FAA To Replace Jets with Big, Harmless Gliders
Esopus Indians Claim Responsibility For NYC Attack
Dutch Treaty of 1640 “Invalid” Say Terrorists
America’s Symbols of Military, Economic Power Attacked
Symbols of Doughnut Consumption, String Collecting Miraculously Untouched
Bush Declares Sep 11 “A Day That Will Live In Imfany”
CBS To Award Last WTC Survivor $1 Million,
Final Elimination Round Approaches
Nations’s Tragedy Metaphor Reserves Depleted