Primary anorgasmia in women: A survey

In My Humble Opinion
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  1. Did you have Primary anorgasmia at age 25? (that is, never had an orgasm by that age?)

No. I started masturbating at approximately age 11 (give or take a year - I clearly remember the first time I masturbated, but I’ll be damned if I can remember how old I was at the time). I didn’t recognize the sensation as an orgasm per se until I was somewhat older - and even then it was more of an “Ahh - so that’s what they call that” sort of moment. I wasn’t sexually active with a partner until I was 20 - but I’ve never had anorgasmia (at least not on a persistent basis - I’ve had encounters when it clearly just wasn’t gonna happen for me, which were still enjoyable - but those are infrequent and at unpredictable intervals).

  1. And if so, have you achieved orgasm after the age of 25?

N/A

I also think the vaginal vs. clitoral orgasm dichotomy is bunk. But that’s just my personal opinion :slight_smile:

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I have tried two different vibrators, and a vibrating ‘egg’ that was inserted inside… I liked the last one best, the sensation of a vibrator on my clit was a weird combination of “oooh, nice!” and just slightly setting my teeth on edge. Looking back, I don’t think I tried nearly enough variation with the vibrators though. I had confided in an older friend when I was in my mid twenties, and she sent me off to Ann Summers with a guarantee that these toys would absolutely, definitely bring me to orgasm. When it didn’t happen after a few sessions I gave up. If (when! when! got to be positive!) I ever catch sight of my libido again, I’ll dust them off and be less impatient, and less easily frustrated. And I’ll definitely be trying the static pressure Nava suggests (thank you for the tip!).

eleanorigby, your advice to stop stressing and just enjoy whatever is happening is excellent. It took me a long time and a lot of unnecessary angst to arrive at that position. I think it might help if anorgasmia was more widely talked about. On TV, in films, even in everyday life, it seems like every woman has orgasms as easily as falling off a log.

(Sorry for straying from the information-gathering QtM)