Thanks for the correction; I didn’t know that. I do know that it can take on many of the characteristics of an addiction: increasing “tolerance” and a need for more (or “different”) to achieve the same results, shame and secrecy from one’s family and friends, etc. And the addiction-recovery model that SLAA uses is based on AA’s twelve-step program.
It can ruin relationships, financial well-being, self-esteem, careers. And unlike most addictions/compulsions/whatever, there’s not much public awareness of it yet; the explosion of the Internet in the last ten years has vastly increased the availability of pornography (this is not news).
Let me stress again: The stepdad may be fine, and may simply enjoy looking at naked people from time to time, as most people do. As I said, I’ve been through some ugly shit lately dealing with this subject, and I recognize the tendency to suddenly see this kind of thing everywhere when one’s had to look at it up close.
Then again, he may have a problem. Either way, it’ll be worth raizok’s time to educate himself about this.
I wouldn’t say that porn is “addictive” but I do think that it can be mighty “habit forming”. If indeed this is the supposedly x-ray lens then I would bet the marriage is in real trouble. It has ruined relationships and causes great pain to the parties involved. This should be a real wake up call for your mother if that turns out to be the case.