I was looking for punchlines for real jokes that are funny on their own, mainly because you can figure out the basic idea. You don’t need to know the joke to figure out what a guy with a 12 inch pianist really wanted.
I don’t have to outrun the bear.
You don’t eat a pig like that all at once!
“Oh, I gave up on that idea. Pigs are quieter.”
So the one legged jockey says, “Dont worry about me baby, I ride sidesaddle!”
“That dog would bite you”
“Bennet? Hell I broke it!”
First dirty joke punchline I ever heard.
“You’re the one who brought her, you liquor”
I’m not sure there even IS a setup.
First one I heard was,
“How far’s the Old Log Inn?”
“Liquor in Phoenix, poker in Vegas”
“No, I just had some icecream”
and
“Then the Bartender says, Hey, that’s not a spoon!”
Thank you, I’m here all week. Hey, I laughed when you guys came in here wearing the funny clothes. 
A wealthy tourist on vacation in Spain is dining in an expensive restaurant. He notices some sort of celebration going on; a man is seated at the table of honor, the owner of the restaurant is personally waiting on him, and the head chef brings out the man’s meal: an extravagent dish featuring two large round balls of meat. Intrigued, the tourist asks his waiter what it’s all about. The waiter replies that every year, after the grand bullfight, the person who bid the highest gets to dine on the bull’s cajones. So the wealthy tourist decides to put in his bid for next year. The following year, he returns to Spain and is notified that his is the highest bid and is invited back to the restaurant. Now it’s his turn to sit at the table of honor, being waited on by the owner, and have the head chef bring out his meal. But when the platter is put in front of him, instead of two large round bull testicles, there are only two tiny balls of meat about the size of grapes. Outraged, the tourist demands to know the meaning of this. The restaurant owner bows his head apologetically and replies “Sometimes senior, the bull wins”.
I’ve always heard it: Liquor in the front, poker in the rear.
Blowjob?! You’ll get a blowjob when that Armstrong kid walks on the moon!
I used this as a psych experiment once in college. Works amazingly well. About 80% of people laughed, 20% looked puzzled.
"and the bear says, ‘you aren’t really here for the hunting are you?’ "
And my all time favorite joke ever…that my MOTHER told me… the punchline is…
“…but the chicken was MY idea!”
As the story is usually told, the punchline is “Good luck, Mr. Gorski!”
“and thats when they made me their chief.”
Slowly slinking off in shame, hanging head the entire way