Why couldn’t you rise it off???
Would you want to eat a cracker that had been run under the faucet?
Well, aren’t we the picky eater?
What, are you a big proponent of the five second rule?
Wait–you mean it’s not the five-minute rule?
Why are we not surprised to hear you ask that?
What else did those coyotes who raised me from infancy fail to teach me?
Five second? What kinda crap is that? Will that be enough time to absorb a new flavor?
What kind of new flavor do you have in mind?
How about a red oak and green Croc blend?
Croc like those rubber shoes, or like those toothy reptiles in Florida?
Why not both?
Would you eat it?
Can I pour some salsa over it?
Is that all it would take to render either of them palatable?
Wouldn’t it depend on how much salsa I have?
Would a swimming pool full of salsa even be sufficient for that?
Can you imagine my embarrassment the time I took chips to salsa class?
Is that an incident you’d prefer to dance around?
Did I ever tell you about the time I took a cannister of Pringles to a poker game when I was asked to bring chips?