“…OG!”
“I need money. Who can…”
…I get to sleep with me, so I can then sue for sexual harresment?"
"The only draw back to have two legs is…
“That My bottom is further away from the Earth than I would like it to be.”
“Looking to the sky, I can see bright green Monkeys - they are looking in their pockets for…”
“toll money, because they weren’t smart enough to buy EZ Pass transponders.”
“Betty looked about her living room, the soiled carpet, broken furniture, unclaimed undergarments, and wondered…”
“…did life ever get any better than this? It thrilled her little trailer-park heart as she went out to lay a man-trap along the road.”
“I have three photographs on my desk. Three photographs. And the worst thing about them is…”
they all show my wife ONCE if you put them next to each other.
Yesterday I creamed the heavy weight boxing champion in a chess game and he …
“…tasted sooo good. The carrots added the final touch.”
“May I never again see…”
my grandmother-in-law in a short skirt, bent over on a windy day.
If you cant stand annoying kids , …
“…start out practicing annoying the bejabbers out of your peers, then just work your way down the chronological scale.”
“As I attempted to roll up the windowshade…”
I got stuck and now people think I’m Jewish
When I saw cookingpan flying towards me in the kitchen I thought…
Damn, another polergeist."
"Baking soda should never be underestimated as a…
“…substitute for flouring chicken before frying. It’ll clean the pan, whiten your teeth, take care of your heartburn and deodorize the refrigerator when you put the leftovers in it.”
“I’m not gonna’ rake any more…”
Moderator’s Notes:
I think we’re done with this one, too.