Quotes out of context ...

… can be awfully amusing.

Overheard just moments ago at my office was a woman saying, “Don’t you dare tug on my shrimp!”

Yesterday on the bus, in an indignant voice:

“Well, do YOU think Frank Sinatra is in heaven?!”


Said by a girl I knew in elementary school: “Dougie broke my G-string.”

“His anal glands are going to pop all over your face!”

Overheard this morning while I was getting ready for work. Apparently one cat was licking the other’s butt.

Just this morning, I managed to wake myself up from a sound sleep with a horrendous cramp in my calf. As I limped around the bedroom later, my wife, being sweet and sincere and incredibly sympathetic, says to me, “Is there anywhere you’d like me to rub?”

:eek: :smiley:

My wife, on the phone in her office, said: “Sure, I love dick.”

Of course, “dick” actually was “Dick,” referring to a friend whose last name is “Dickerson” when asked if he could be in our wedding. Her co-workers got a kick out of it.

Brendon Small

To steal one from Bob Newhart:

When passing two homeless guys panhandling on the sidewalk, one said incredulously “When the hell were YOU the goalie for the Montreal Canadiens?”

Y’all might like Overheard in New York.

Heard wafting from the mechanics shed from a former job: “And by the time you’re done with that, your arm is sore and your ass is sore”.