Yeah, when my phone rings, it’s not because someone wants to offer me cake.
And people wonder what’s wrong with the workplace. Not enough cake offerings. That’s what’s wrong.
Oh, we have cake. It’s just that I hear about it via e-mail, not my phone.
All those tv channels and nothing I fancy watching.
Going to a funeral Friday, and an official function Saturday.
Going to make a cup of drinking chocolate in a minute.
I don’t feel tired, hope I sleep tonight.
I’m bored .
Wow I actually enjoyed that !
I’ll hit this thread again .
I love listening to politician-types skirt around issues with their replies—like where you walk away more confused than before you asked the question.
OK, so you want to do knock-knock jokes?
That’s fine… you start.
My daughter is using my car till tomorrow.
I miss my car.
I hope it (and her) are all right.
And never have I wanted SO badly to get in my car and drive somewere…help, I’m trapped in the house without a car!
“What do you get when you kiss a goat
A mouth full of spit and some empty tin cans
That’s what you get when you kiss a goat
Oh I’ll… never kiss a goat again!”
It’s the plumber, I’ve come to fix the sink.
I’m making bread! Again. Also, I may not have gotten over my prejudice against wheat bread. White just TASTES BETTER, dammit!
When I wear my hand-me-down skirt over one of my t-shirts, I feel like hot shit. Damn I’m such a hipster.
Heh, my boyfriend paces when he talks on the phone, too.
For the last few days I have been sorting historical figures into Hogwarts houses. I may or may not make a thread about this.
I told this to my co-workers for an end-of-day laugh. It worked. 
Thanks for sharing - did you come up with it? It sorta sounds like a nursery rhyme.
One of the hottest days of the year so far and I had the uncontrollable urge to bake cookies. Mint double-chocolate chip. Who wants one?
Me, me, me!
I want a cookie.
I want a beer.
I want to meet Robert Irvine.
I want him to stfu.
I want another cookie.
It’s the plumber, I’ve come to fix the sink who?
I want Fritos.
Stop being such a meanhole.
In a year no one will give a shit. Really.
Theme song from the “Mary Tyler Moore” show repeating itself endlessly in my head. Wish to hell it would stop.
Saw a baby alligator lizard on my walk today. Cute little guy was maybe 3 inches long.