I was talking to a friend this am, she was talking about her man and just out of the blue she asks me if I think he loves her more than he loved his ex.
My first thought is wtf?
He’s with you, not with her and I’d assume if he wanted to be with her he would be, Why are you even worried about it? Why do you want to compare what you have with him now with what he had with her then? There probably is no comparison, I don’t even understand the question. Unless the guy is constantly talking about his ex in glowing terms, in which case I’d dump him because if he’s that hung up on his ex then he needs to go back to her.
She is not the first friend say something like that and I think am I abnormal because the thought has never even occurred to me? I’ve never compared myself to an ex because I figure there’s a reason they are the ex and it isn’t my concern. Am I more secure, or just too stupid to realize a man could be with me and love somebody else more?
A while back a friend said to me about another couple I know, Do you ever think about what the two of them look like when they are having sex?
Um, no, I don’t think about people I know having sex, I don’t even want to think about the people I know having sex. I don’t even want to think about two random people I see having sex. There is not enough brain bleach to wash that thought out of my mind so why even go there? It has never even occurred to me to go there.
I thought this friend was just kind of weird until another friend asked me the same think about the same couple.
No, this couple isn’t super attractive, or ugly, just a normal couple.
Am I abnormal? Does everybody run around thinking about what their friends look like having sex? I’m kind of squicked out by the thought that people I know may be thinking about what I look like having sex having sex with my partner.
I’m not squicked out if a man thinks about having sex with me, just that anybody would think about me being with somebody else.
If you think about human society it is like we come online in a reality where we are taught about it by others who came online earlier than us, and will likely go offline sooner than us. A lot of parents are obsessed with indoctrinating their kids with their culture or religion, molding little “mental clones” of themselves. It is just kind of weird how humans blink in and out of existence, but we all have things told to us by those who were here before us, things we did not personally experience.
It starts to seem like human culture and society is just a very inefficient form of immorality.
I know that, and I’m of an age now where I’d find it both flattering and baffling.
It’s the idea of thinking couples you know having sex that is weird to me.
I’d say it was a man thing except one friend who asked me is a man and the other is a woman.
Let’s say there is some incredibly talented person we all know of, Michael Jackson for example. From time to time, these amazing people are born that are just so much more gifted than the rest of us. Lucky us, we were born at a time that allowed us to experience Michael Jackson!
But…a thousand years ago, there was probably somebody else born who was equally special. Who knows what this amazing person was capable of? Whatever it was, it didn’t survive for us to experience.
And after we die, someone else is going to come along who will be excellent beyond imagination.
We have to miss out on those folks, they belong to somebody else. Makes me sad.
Dung Beetle’s post reminds of a comic strip I saw a while ago (it was Pearls Before Swine) that struck a chord with me. Name one famous and talented person from the 21st century. Chances are you can think of multiple people, right? Now name one from the 20th century. Still tons of options. Now from the 19th. The 18th. The 17th. The 16th. The 15th. On and on until you can’t think of a name from that particular century. Depending on your level of historical knowledge (so yeah, this doesn’t really work on history majors), there will eventually be a century where you draw a blank. Think about that - for a whole 100 year period, even the most incredibly talented, amazing human being who achieved unbelievable success is now forgotten.
