Hi All! I’m back! I know, you didn’t even notice I was gone, (or care for that matter), but this is Mundane Pointless Stuff I Must Share, so I’m just following the code.
I’ve just had an adventure. Sort of. Mostly it was a disappointment. What do you do when you genuinely love somebody, but you are convinced that they have lived a slacker life for so long that they just don’t know how else to live but you are too old for that?!
That would be my husband. He’s up in BC, living on disability and apparently was content to continue to do so. Now, to be honest, I don’t know exactly why the province is paying him. Is it his depression which he is medicated for? Or his old back injury? I don’t know. He doesn’t give me straight answers about this. Which I guess should answer all my questions but doesn’t. Anyway, when we’d used up all the money I had saved for my residency fees and he still wouldn’t work, and then my 6 months was over I headed back to the states. I told him I wasn’t coming back unless/until he straightened up. Now, I don’t need alot and I expect to work for it, but if I’m part of a couple I expect him to work for it too if he can reasonably expected to. And despite the fact that the province pays him disability I know he can work because when he lived in the states with me (yes, illegally, that’s stopped, it’s over please don’t sidetrack this thread. You can pit me if you just must.), he helped me with 2 paper routes. Not at the same time. But if you can lift bundles of newspapers every night for over two years, there is some job you can do. He is a high school drop out, and doesn’t have his GED which he talks about but isn’t doing anything about. I know this makes him out to be a total loser, but he really isn’t, although he may be kidding me and himself about how much he wants our marriage to work.
Anyway, this isn’t really about that. It’s about what I should do with myself. He may or may not get his act together but I’m not getting any younger, and need to get mine together. I need to know if I should get some job training, and if yes, what in. Where do I live? If he does get it together, do we get him down here or do I try Canada again? This time nobody is going anywhere until after residency has been granted.
So where do the smartest people I know hang out? Here on the dope. So I’m asking you guys to give me input on how to fix my life. I know you don’t know me, but that’s good. No preconceived notions. But here is stuff you probably do need to know, and feel free to ask questions.
I have 3 adult kids from a previous marriage who all live in NE Ohio. Near my Ex., who I attempted to maintain a friendship with, but now admit that all I can do is be civil at family occasions, (like my oldest daughters wedding in Aug. '05). I am currently living in the Philly area with my Mom. If I stay in this area I will be looking for my own place. I’m paying room and board. I’m working with a temp agency, reguarly so far. I am looking permanent work, but not as hard as I could because I don’t know if I’ll be moving. I am a hs grad and have some college under my belt but no degree. I’ve done Clerical work most of my life. I don’t mind the bookkeeping part, but don’t like the receptionist part. I would love to get excited about a job but don’t think it’s likely.
Anything else you need to know ask, but if it’s too intrusive I may not answer.
Thanks for any helpful advice!
