No spouse. Only child.
Yup. Parents divorced (and my mom is dead).
Had a sister but she died. No other siblings.
In NYS that makes me the automatic recipient of the entire estate. Which consists of aforementioned grungy little house, 2 sketchy cars and a metric ton of obsolete computer equipment, CRT monitors and a 1970s refrigerator. Lots of stuff to pay special disposal fees on. No mortgage or car loans, at least! All of his real property is owned outright.
ETA - filing in surrogate court as voluntary administrator is easy (or would be if I didn’t live 7 hours away). That’s what a lawyer is for - the one my dad consulted about a will is right across the street from the surrogate court where I’ll have to file. And I know his rates are reasonable.
It makes sense to me. Send your Aunt cash and gifts as your abilty and her need requires.
In reading the rest of the thread I have one more question. After Dad shuffles off this mortal coil, can you make a gift of all his property to Aunt and let her deal with it? Sound like she has more time to sort it out than you do.
She’s retired. This sounds like a compelling idea.
Won’t any profits made on the house be eaten up by the medical bills your dad is incurring?
IN the Netherlands, it is possible to accept an inheritance “beneficially” which means that you only want it if the inheritance is a net positive, financially. You can ask for some time to do research after the person dies, and if ther eturns out to be more debt then activa, you as his heir can refuse the inheritance alltogether. In that case, it is important not to do anything that suggests you aceept the inheritance; not even taking sentimental keepsakes from your dad’s house.
I don’t know if US law has a similar thing. Might be wise in your dad’s case.
Debt is not generally heritable in the US. If his medical providers bill the estate (and they may not, it depends how nice they are), then they will have to get in line with all the deceased’s other creditors. Once the money is gone, all his debts are scrubbed. In no circumstances would **Motorgirl **be obligated to pay on her father’s debts, unless she volunteers to do so. I don’t know how the sale of the home will work, or how the proceeds will factor into the estate, though. I believe that would vary by jurisdiction. And it depends upon how quickly the house is sold.
If, in a situation like this, you *can’t *sell the house (because nobody will buy it), what happens? Does the bank take possession? Can you bulldoze it?
I think you’re making the right choice.
My estraged (and strange) father is slowly going blind. My beloved grandaddy, his father, really, really wants me to care about that.
I don’t.
I realised that I felt more guilty that I was disappointing my grandaddy than I did about not caring about my dad, which made me feel better.
Do what you have to do, but you don’t owe him anything. Hang in there.
That seems excessive.
Makes perfect sense. My main chunk of Putting Up With Mom consists of calling her every Saturday: there’s things I am adept at zoning out of but which would send my brothers’ blood pressure through the ceiling. We all Open Glass Jars and Cans (and remind Mom she’s not supposed to buy any glass jars or cans which have not been certified Really Easy To Open), Littlebro eats lunch with her most days (gives her someone to cook for), Middlebro provides grandkids and splits Honey-Dos with me.
Rachellelogram is correct - I won’t be inheriting any of his debt (which should actually be small or non-existent because he has a good Medicare and VA health plan, and gets prescription assistance from NYS). If he has debt, it will be discharged out of the estate, and anything leftover will come to me. If nothing is left, I won’t be sad. It’s not worth much anyway, and I certainly am not expecting anything.
If the house won’t sell - who knows. I’m willing to go pretty low on the price. Anybody want a strange little house in the boonies? 
ETA - without a mortgage, there isn’t really a bank to take the house, I think. The state can put a tax lien against it if we don’t pay the property and school taxes.
Does it? I haven’t gotten around to my will yet, so I am not sure what the going rate is. It’s possible the $900 included the power of attorney work, which my dad did do.
IANAL, but if he is simply going leave everything to you, that seems as simple as a will can be.
Good point.
There’s a good chance my mother’s still alive somewhere. If I ever found out for sure, she would have to consider herself lucky if I didn’t look into hiring a hitman to do her. I’m sure there are meaner, more evil bitches in the world, but if there are, I don’t want to meet them.
The bottom line is: Parents who don’t care about being parents have no claims on their offsprings’ attention.
Join the online Freecycle group in his area. When it’s time to get rid of stuff, start listing all the stuff you want hauled away. Most of it people will come and get for free.
I’m not familiar with your situation, obviously, but in my IMO, people vastly overestimate the ability of one parent to stick up for their kids when the other parent is coming down on them like a ton of bricks.
Even if he drew up a will and left all or part to someone else? I find that hard to believe.
I’m pretty sure OP is saying that in the absence of a will it all goes to her.
I wondered about that too, but the OP seems to be saying that she owes the guy nothing at all and he’s a complete stranger, and if he’s deliberately leaving her all of his estate, when he has other relatives and possibly friends that he could leave all or some to, then he is at least trying to do something for her. House without a mortgage has to be worth something. I’ll take it …
If he drew up a will his things would go to whomever he puts in the will. But he hasn’t. He’s planning to die intestate.
As for him trying to do something for me, yes you could look at it that way. On the other hand he could just be being lazy and cheap. Though I say the estate is “automatically” mine if he dies intestate, there’s not a lot of “automatic” in it - I have to file lots of paperwork and administer the estate (discharge debts, etc). I would have to file far less paperwork if he drew up a will and named heirs and an executor.
He’s not being cheap because you offered to pay for it. Maybe just lazy.
But one thing you need to consider - if he’s as big of a jerk as you say - is trhat maybe he doesn’t want to draw up a will because he already has one in which you are not the sole heir, and he doesn’t want to override it. (Sorry to bring that up, but the thought did occur to me.)
Wouldn’t you have to do that anyway? Or do you mean that you would have less work if he left someone else as the executor. (Could you just hire someone to do this?)
[Sorry for dragging this OT a bit. Feel free to ignore if you’d rather focus on other aspects.]