If this has already made the rounds, sorry, but I just had to share:
http://www.geocities.com/yosemite/7491/myvette.html
Hell, it explains why I, the atheist, am stuck with this piece of shit Corsica.
I’m an agnostic. I guess that’s why God broke my cardan axle two weeks ago. I had it coming. :rolleyes:
No disrespect to any Christians, but this is nothing short of ridiculous. Doesn’t God have anything better to do than to be a personal shopper for midlife crisis victims?
Working backwards from your personal conviction, it is usually easy to find the things you need to confirm that your conviction is pre-ordained by the will of God. (These kinds of “pre-ordained by God” things could also be known as “coincidences” to us poor, unenlightened folk.) But I have to say, your whole quote was gibberish to me, black455. If they’re going to justify doing what they want to do, couldn’t they do it in a more coherent fashion? I mean, really.
Oh brother.
When I was a tot, I used to go to Bible school. This was just after the cease-fire in Vietnam. Yes, that’s relevant. One of the instructors had just moved house, and was telling us about how she needed curtains, and was praying for them.
During this time, my mom had been doing a lot of crying while she watched the news. One evening, she was particularly lachrymose, and I asked her why. She explained as best she could that something called “Operation Babylift” (?) was going to bring thousands of Vietnamese orphans to America. “They don’t have parents. They don’t have houses. They don’t even have milk. Now they’ll be adopted, and they’ll get to live in nice houses and have enough to eat.”
Then (I’m unclear on the exact time frame; I was four years old, after all), the Bible school instructor announced that her prayers had been answered, and she had her curtains.
It didn’t make a darn bit of sense to me. All those children starving, and God dropped everything to get this woman curtains? That was the first time that I started to have doubts. It didn’t destroy my faith, but I did shy away from that kind of thinking. God is not the Yellow Pages!
At least Jesus has good taste in cars… although I’ve always picture him behind the wheels of a family car.
The lengths to which people will go to justify their own delusions and insanity never ceases to amaze me.
A teacher in High School regaled our class one day with the story of How God Came To Her. She said that she was in despair, and wanted a sign from God. So she told God that she wanted, as a sign that God cared about her, him to manifest himself as a puddle on her bathroom floor.
Sure enough, by the end of the day, after her children had finished washing up and brushing their teeth, she walked into the bathroom and noticed a puddle on the floor under the sink.
So then she was a believer.
Someone in the class was brave enough to say “How do you know your kids didn’t splash the water?”, to which she snapped back “The Lord works through children, because children are ‘golden lambs’.” (someone should tell that to the golden lamb that was throwing rocks at my house…)
While reading your post, Anthracite, it occurred to me that I have never even considered asking God to prove itself to me. I’m not completely wise in the way of religions, but isn’t that what faith is all about?
.Here’s another selection from the fellow’s Web site.
Of course, God delivered
Wrong, wrong, wrong, SPOOFE.
The Father drives, the Holy Spirit rides shotgun and Jesus plays it taxi style. The Father never lets Jesus drive, not even the minivan to the gas station. From what Jesus tells me he’ll only be old enough to drive when he’s old as all the time that’s ever been.
A great inspiration to me has always been Psalm 69 - Jesus Built My Hotrod by the great prophet Al Jourgensen. Touching and deeply spiritual.
Heh. This is too funny. I just wrote and posted a loooong story about the need for Faith in God with artificial intelligence. It must have really been running through my head for me to even post about it. 
It is a common theme I hear though; people asking God to “send them a sign”. Often times, the sign they pick is something so likely to happen that they never set themselves up for failure - like “If you exist, make my husband fart tonight.” 
What - no Mustang GT with flame effects?
Ok, so is what you people are saying ‘turn to jesus and you get a cool car and a woman?’
Why does this seem like a plan with now draw backs.
Sign me up! I want a mint condition 1953 J2X Allard and Jennifer Connaly!
athiest here…
all i have is a humble '66 Mustang, springtime yellow, no flames
<sigh>
wasn’t there an entire thread dedicated to “what kind of car would Jesus drive” recently?? I just remember laughing so hard I had to go to the bathroom, there were some very clever answers with bible verses to back them up…
“flaming chariot of God” my ass! This op is exactly the reason religion has such a bad reputation.
Amen