What Would Jesus Drive
In the paper this weekend there was a story about a group of who are trying to have us make our vehicle purchase on what some guy 2000 odd years ago would choose. Now in my opinion he would choose something along the lines of horse or mule drawn, it just does not relate to well in these times. The morning DJs (Bob and Tom) were talking about it and read a letter from a listener who suggest that Jesus would drive a Harley Now personaly I do my vehicle buying desions based on what I can afford and what I will use it for, not on what some dead guy thinks.
Man 1: Should I finish college? Rabbi Krustofsky: Yes. No one is poor except he who lacks knowledge. Woman carrying baby: Rabbi, should I have another child? Rabbi K: Yes. Another child would be a blessing on your house. Man 2: Rabbi, should I buy a Chrysler? Rabbi K: Eh, couldn’t you rephrase that as a, as an ethical question? Man 2: Um… is it right to buy a Chrysler? Rabbi K: Oh, yes! For great is the car with power steering and dynaflow suspension!
I just wanted to pipe that when they were talking about Jesus riding a Harley, I almost choked on my OJ…not a good thing while merging onto the highway.
“Think about it, he’s got the beard and long hair. He hangs out with the undesirables. A Harley is fuel efficient…”
hehe [sub]Speaking of B&T, don’t forget that DaVinci’s Notebook is gonna be there tomorrow![/sub]
A Christler, oh Jesus, I am dying! Outstanding post!
Let’s see- the long hair, the sandals- yep, I’m leaning towards a VW bus. What was that line from the song Convoy? “Eleven long-haired Friends of Jesus in a chartruese Microbus.”
Where did I pull that lyric from? Whoa…
I love Bob & Tom- in LA, they had a commercial on the air for their show, set in front of a urinal. They are peeing when Dennis Rodman walks up between them & starts peeing too. Bob & Tom look down at Rodman’s lower half, and the dialog starts-
B & T- “Wow, that thing is huge! That’s a hoss!” etc…
DR- “Well, I like it. And the ladies do too.”
B & T- “Mind if we take a closer look?”
DR- “Not at all.”
Than Rodman holds up his hand, and they’ve been eyeing his NBA champoinship ring, not his johnson. I laughed my ASS off! Rodman was actually quite funny. Not so funny when he lives in your neighborhood, though… But that’s another rant.
> “For I do not speak of my own Accord but of my father’s.”
Can’t top that.
Jesus doesn’t drive AMC, according to Obadiah 1:1-2. “We have heard a rumour from the LORD, and an ambassador is sent among the heathen, Arise ye, and let us rise up against her in battle.”
The right-wing fundies would have us believe that Jesus would be driving an American-made Cadillac Escalade, fully loaded. In reality, He’d probably be happy in an old VW Bug, 20 year old Subaru, or in posession of a public transit pass.
One of the great Universal Mysteries is finally solved. God drives a Japanese car. Assuming that he hasn’t since traded it in for a Kia, I wonder if it is still in good shape after 2000 years . I am going to pray to try to find out the mileage and see if he might be willing to let it go cheap. I just hope that I would’t have to go to Heaven to pick it up :eek
Damn, I thought that this would be a rant about those stupid WWJD wristbands people wear or those bumperstickers that say, “The Death Penalty: WWJD?” To me the answer seems pretty obvious: He’d die like he did the last time, morons!
PS Am I the only guy out there who thinks, “Jesus would say I need a blowjob!” when he sees a cute chick sporting one of those WWJD wristbands?
Now personaly I do my vehicle buying desions based on what I can afford and what I will use it for, not on what some dead guy thinks.