Okay, today I have seen
and
Brilliant. I want more!
From Futurama:
Sweet Zombie Jesus!
Jumping Jesus on a pogo stick!
Jesus Christ on a Crutch is one of my favorites.
Wasn’t that because He had already come back as a zombie in like the year 2300?
In Spider Robinson’s Lady Slings the Booze (yes, I typed the title accurately), a number of characters use severa variations on these expressions – each occasion very shortly thereafter followed by a handyman who looks just like Christ appearing in the appropraite mode (ever seen anyone descend a staircase on a pogo stick? That’s a place where you really [need to be able to suspend the laws of physics! ;))
“Jesus!”
“Where?” -running gag in Orgazmo
“Jesus Christ on a toasted bagel!” -my special lady 
When I saw a thread about Jesus started by a poster named Jean Grey, I wondered if someone was speculating that Jesus was a mutant or something.
Jesus Christ on whole wheat toast!
Jesus H. Christ with extra cheese!
Jesusbert Humperdinck!
OMO!!! (oh my og)
next, there will be an automated sweeping machine called something like -
“And Jesus Swept”, named after …
(well what do I know, this is probably already a million dollar baby)
“and Jesus wept…”
As the lone semi-heretic in my Bible class at a Baptist college, when the professor wondered aloud why people said Jesus H. Christ, I got a round of applause for responding that His middle name was HellifIknow.
I also got a week of social probation for being a smartmouth. (Yeah, they were strict back in the Dark Ages when I was in college.)
My favorites are:
Hay-soos Ka-Rees-Tay
and Bleedin’ Jesus in a Barbed Wire Beanie
There’s a movie, and I don’t remember which, in which a character says, “Jesus H. Christ on a popsicle stick”
Somehow that got evolved by people I knew into.
Jesus H. Tapdancing Christ on a popsicle stick.
Actually, the “H” is for Howard - as in “Howard be thy name”
Shit, you’re both wrong, Cecil cleared this up years ago.
The “H” stands for “Hallmark” because God cared enough to send the very best.
Help me Jebus – Homer Simpson
When ever any one says “Jesus!” I always answer “How can I help?”
or along the same lines if someone says “God damn it!” I always answer “[name of item] has been damned”
Warning Very Tasteless Comment Below.
Brother had a coworker who used to say “Jeasus F*#ing Christ on the cross” Someone finally came up with a reply “Man that takes talent”
Christ on a stick!
I forget where I heard that last one, but I used it for awhile until I spontaneously exclaimed, “Jesus Crap!” and have used it ever since.
This one wins so far:
But surely there are more?
And no, I don’t think he’s a mutant.